Mark Twain Quotes, Pessimistic Quotes, Pessimist Quotes

Pessimist: The optimist who didn't arrive.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pessimistic Quotes , Pessimist Quotes

I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.

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Out of the unconscious lips of babes and sucklings are we satirized.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes , Lips Quotes

A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom when he can no longer be led by the nose.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

The low level which commercial morality has reached in America is deplorable. We have humble God fearing Christian men among us who will stoop to do things for a million dollars that they ought not to be willing to do for less than 2 millions.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Christian Quotes , Humble Quotes

It is noble to teach oneself; it is still nobler to teach others.

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History teaches us that whenever a weak and ignorant people possess a thing which a strong and enlightened people want, it must be yielded up peaceably.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Strong Quotes , People Quotes

All you drunkards: Put down the intoxicating Vanity Metrics.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Vanity Quotes , Metrics Quotes

I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dog Quotes , Animal Quotes

You must not pay a person a compliment, and then straightway follow it with a criticism.

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The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Age Quotes , Aging Quotes

The ordinary chestnut can beget a sickly and reluctant laugh, but it takes a horse chestnut to fetch the gorgeous big horse-laugh.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , Laughing Quotes

He was sunshine most always-I mean he made it seem like good weather.

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Once you've put one of his [Henry James] books down, you simply can't pick it up again.

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Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Thinking Quotes

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Tails Quotes

I am always on the side of the revolutionists, because there never was a revolution unless there were some oppressive and intolerable conditions against which to revolute.

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Every time I reform in one direction I go overboard in another.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , One Direction Quotes , Reform Quotes

The proverb says, "Born lucky, always lucky," and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for one or two of our lads (per annum) to get drowned in the Mississippi or in Bear Creek, but I was pulled out in a 2/3 drowned condition 9 times before I learned to swim, and was considered to be a cat in disguise.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Duties are not performed for duty's sake, but because their neglect would make the man uncomfortable. A man performs but one duty - the duty of contenting his spirit, the duty of making himself agreeable to himself.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Accountability Quotes