Mark Twain Quotes, School Quotes, Holiday Quotes

Schoolboy days are no happier than the days of afterlife, but we look back upon them regretfully because we have forgotten our punishments at school and how we grieved when our marbles were lost and our kites destroyed – because we have forgotten all the sorrows and privations of the canonized ethic and remember only its orchard robberies, its wooden-sword pageants, and its fishing holidays.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , School Quotes , Holiday Quotes

...fry me an optimist for breakfast.

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None of us can be as great as God, but any of us can be as good.

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An occultation of Venus is not half so difficult as an eclipse of the sun, but because it comes seldom the world thinks it's a grand thing.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Eclipse Of The Sun Quotes

If you have to swallow a frog, don't stare at it too long.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Long Quotes , Frogs Quotes

Let your joy be unconfined!

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A little starvation can really do more for the average sick man than can the best medicines and the best doctors.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Doctors Quotes

Make your vacation your vocation.

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If you need help identifying actionable analytics check out this post.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Needs Quotes , Helping Quotes

Between believing a thing and thinking you KNOW is only a small step and quickly taken.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Taken Quotes

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiring Quotes

Surely the ass who invented the first religion ought to be the first ass damned

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Atheist Quotes

All saints can do miracles, but few of them can keep a hotel.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Miracle Quotes , Saint Quotes

Most people can't bear to sit in church for an hour on Sundays. How are they supposed to live somewhere very similar to it for eternity?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Atheist Quotes

The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Race Quotes , Coward Quotes

That is a simple rule, and easy to remember. When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane; not in all things, but in religious matters.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Thoughtful Quotes

An occasional compliment is necessary to keep up one's self-respect.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Self Quotes , Self Respect Quotes

Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Crazy Quotes

The longing of my heart is a fairy portrait of myself: I want to be pretty; I want to eliminate facts and fill up the gap with charms.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heart Quotes , Want Quotes

A mighty porterhouse steak an inch and a half thick, hot and sputtering from the griddle; dusted with fragrant pepper; enriched with little melting bits of butter of the most impeachable freshness and genuineness; the precious juices of the meat trickling out and joining the gravy, archipelagoed with mushrooms; a township or two of tender, yellowish fat gracing an out-lying district of this ample county of beefsteak; the long white bone which divides the sirloin from the tenderloin still in its place.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Mushrooms Quotes