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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- The human race consists of the damned and the ought-to-be damned.
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- Optimist: Person who travels on nothing from nowhere to happiness.
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- If horses knew their strength we should not ride anymore.
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- The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.
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- What is there that confers the noblest delight? What is that which swells a man's breast with pride above that which any other experience can bring to him? Discovery!
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- To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, "Our Country, right or wrong," and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?
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- Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.
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- You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopaths (orthodoxy) to destroy it.
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- Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
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- She is not refined. She is not unrefined. She keeps a parrot
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- There is not an acre of ground on the globe that is in possession of its rightful owner, or that has not been taken away from owner after owner, cycle afer cycle, by force and bloodshed.
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- I found out that I was a Christian for revenue only and I could not bear the thought of that, it was so ignoble.
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- There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
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- Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog: Nobody really enjoys it, and the frog generally dies as a result.
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- If you need help identifying actionable analytics check out this post.
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- I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, Spencer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I’m not feeling so well myself.
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- Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
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- We laugh and laugh. Then cry and cry- Then feebler laugh, Then die.
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- You try to tell me anything about the newspaper business! Sir, I have been through it from Alpha to Omaha, and I tell you that the less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands.
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- A person who has during all time maintained the imposing position of spiritual head of four-fifths of the human race, and political head of the whole of it, must be granted the possession of executive abilities of the loftiest order.
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