Ek pagal roz yehi kehta tha-
Gulti banaunga, panchi ko marunga..
6 month pagal khane me treatment k baad
Dr. ne pucha- Ab kya karoge?
Pagal- Shadi
Dr.-phir? Pagal-Suhagrat
Dr.-good, phir?Pagal-Sari utarunga
Dr.-phir?Pagal-Blouse utarunga
Dr.-Oh no! phir?Pagal-Br* be utarunga
Dr.-My god, Phir?Pagal-Phir kya!
Br* k elastic se GULTi banaunga or
Panchi Ko Marunga.
Dr.-Oh my gudnes
Sala 2 to perfct pagal hai re..
Heart touching must read:)
Ek din ek ladke ki girlfrnd ka BIRTHDAY tha.
Boy was not in that city.
So, he ordered 24 RED ROSE for his girlfriend.
He called her up.
Dear maine tumhare liye utne ROSE ain jitni saal ki tum ho gyi ho.
While delivering florist thought: Ye aajka mera sabse achha customer hai.
Chalo ise 10 ROSE FREE me de deta hu.
So, he gave 34 instead of 24.
aur aaj tak ladka nahi samajh paya ki
uska BREAK-UP kyu hua..! :D
Read This Funny Story :
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Ek din ek kutta jungle main raasta kho gaya.
Tabhi usne dekha ek sher uski taraf aa raha hai.
Kutte ki saans ruk gayi.
"Aaj to kaam tamaam mera!"
Phir usne saamne kuchh sookhi haddiyan padi
dekhi.
Woh aate hue sher ki taraf peeth kar ke baith
gaya aur ek sookhi hadii ko choosne
laga aur zor zor se bolne laga,
"wah! Sher ko khaane ka mazaa hi kuch aur hai.
Ek aur mil jaaye to poori daawat ho jayegi!"
Aur usne zor se dakaar mara.
.
Is baar sher soch mein pad gayaa,
Usne socha "ye kutta to sher ka shikar karta hai!
Jaan bacha kar bhago!"
Ped par baitha ek Bandar yeh sab tamasha dekh
raha tha.
Usne socha yeh mauka achhahai sher ko saari
kahani bata deta hoon isse sher se
dosti ho jayegi aur zindagi bhar ke liye jaan ka
khatra dur ho jayega !
.
Woh fatafat sher ke pichhe bhaaga.
Kutte ne Bandar ko jaate huedekh liya !
.
Udhar Bandar ne sher ko sab bata diya ki kaise
kutte ne use bewakoof banaya hai.
Sher ne zor se kaha,
"chal mere saath abhi uski leela khatam karta
hoon",
aur Bandar ko apni peeth par baitha kar sher
kutte ki taraf lapka. ! !
Can u imagine the quick management by the
DOG..??
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Kutte ne sher ko aate dekha to ek baar phir uski
taraf peeth karke baith gaya aur zor
zor se bolne laga,
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.
.
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.
.
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"Is Bandar ko bheje huye 1 ghanta ho gaya,
saala ek sher fasaa kar nahi la saka..!!" :)
Ye 1 darawni kahani hai,
kamjor dil wale ise na pade..!!
Barsat ki 1 raat me 1 budha aadmi hath me
1 kitab bechne ke liye khada tha,
1 aadmi aaya aur usne vo kitab 3000/- mein
kharid li Budhe aadmi ne kitab de ke kaha:
Jab tk koi musibat na aaye kitab ka LAST
PAGE mat dekna.
Aadmi ne kitab puri pad li lekin
dar ke karan last page nahi khola.
1 din usse raha nahi gaya
aur last page khol ke dekh hi liya aur
sadme se mar gya..
last page par likha tha..
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MRP-Rs 15/- only!
Lettr to principal.Salaam saale!,
yeh bata kaun haram khor papr set karta h..
Kamino,stdnts ki jaan nikal jati h.
Upar se kutte paper checkng to aise karta h
jaise apni maa ki maut ka badla le rha ho..
Aisa sylbus banaya h jaise tumhare yahan toh
haram khor sab topper hi janme h.
tera baap b is papr mei pass nai hoga.
tu khud is papr mein 10 bar fail hoga.
tu kabhi bahar mil sale..bataunga tujhe...
Urs faithfully,(pagal hu jo apna naam likhunga)
3 cheezain zindagi me 1 bar milti hain
1.Waalden
2.Husn.
3.Jawani
3 cheezain soch samajh ker uthao
1.Qadam
2.Qasam
3.Qalam
3 chizain soch ker karo
1.Mohabbat
2.Bat
3.Faisla
3 chizin kisi ka intezar nahin kartien
1.Maut
2.Waqt
3.Umar
3 chizein choti na samjho
1.Qarz
2.Farz
3.Marz
Padho samjho or amal bhi karo.
Sad Story.
1 Aunty Thi Unki 1 Beti
Thi Wo Uski Boht Care Krti Thi,
Baal Sanwarti Thi, Poniyan Bandhti
Thi k Bachi Achi Dikhay.
Pr Bachi Ki Aankhain Hamesha
Bahir Rehti Theen Aise (0_0)
Aunty Ne Boht Docters Ko Dikhaya
Lekn Wo Sahi Nhi Hui.
Phr 1 Baba Ko Dikhaya To Wo 1
Mint Mai Sahi Ho Gai. Aunty Boht
khush B hui or heran B..
Phr Baba Se Pucha k Aap nay Aisa
Kya Kiya k Wo 1 dam Sahi Ho Gai…
Baba Ny Kaha: Main Ny Sirf Bachi
Ki Poniyan Dheeli Ki hn
Ek Bachche Ne Shankar
Bhagwanji Se Cycle Mangi,
Pr Use Cycle Nahi Mili To
Usne Mandir Se Ganesh
Murti Churai Aur Ek Letter
Rakh Diya Agar Bachcha
Wapis Chahiye To Cycle Le Anaa.
मुट्ठी भर चने खाकर बाप एक लोटा पानी पी लेता है,
अपने बच्चे के महकते टिफिन को सूंघकर वह जी लेता है|
धूप में रिक्शा खींचकर कमाये चंद रुपयों से वह,
आईएएस की तैयारी करते बेटे के लिए घी लेता है|
बच्चों को न तरसने दिया जिसने कपड़ों के लिए,
फटे हुए पाजामे को चुपके से वह बाप सी लेता है|
जो भी बना है घर में सब औलादों को परोसकर,
अपने लिए वह भूखा बाप छोटी सी तस्तरी लेता है|
उसकी जेब से बरसते हैं चॉकलेट और बिस्कीट,
बच्चों की मासूम हंसी में
हीं वह अपनी खुशी समझता हं़
Ek Budhe Aadmi Ne Socha Ki Meri
Biwi Ko Shayad Sun Na Kam Ho
Gaya Hai
So Check Karne Ke Liye Ek Din Uske
Piche Gaya Aur Bola
Buddha:"Janu, Kya Tum Mujhe Sun
RahiHo?"
Koi Jawab Nahi Aya,
Vo Thoda Sa Aur Aage Gaya Aur Fir
Bola
Buddha: "Janu, Kya Tum Mujhe Sun
Rahi Ho?"
Is Bar Bhi Koi Jawab Nahi Aya,
Vo Bilkul Uske Kareeb Chala Gaya
Aur Bola
Buddha: "Janu, Kya Tum Mujhe Sun
Rahi Ho?"
Budhi Chillate Hue: “bhootni Ke, Ye
Teesri Baar Haan Bol
Ek ladki apne boyfriend se park mein roz milne jati Wo roz time par pohonchti,
lekin ladka hamesha late aata Lekin ladki kabhi usse naraz nahi hoti,
Ek din ladki park mei nahi pohonchi,
Ladka gusse se uske ghar gaya Waha pata chala ki ladki ko blood cancer hai aur wo sirf 6 din jiyegi,
Ladka rote huye ghar aya aur sucide karne buildng ke 100th floor par gaya,
Aur ladki ke liye 1 letter chodda Usme likha tha..
Tum mera hamesha wait karti thi aur me roz
late ata tha lekin aaj main jaldi pohonch raha hu aur tumara wait karunga..
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.
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Theek ussi wakt Shaktimaan waha se ja raha tha
Kya Shaktimaan usse bacha payega..?
Janne k liye dekhte rahiye SHAKTIMAAN
Ek time meri Girlfriend ne mujhe apne ghar bulaya,
Mai ghar pahucha aur bell bajai,
Uski choti sister ne darwaza khola,
Wo bahut sundar thi,
Muskura k boli aap bahut smart ho,
Abhi ghar par koi nahi hai.
Mai akeli hu, Mai muskuraya aur,
Apni bike ki taraf wapas jane laga,
To uski puri family ghar se bahar aa gayi aur,
Meri sharafat ki tareef karte huey,
Mujhe gale lagaya aur kaha,
Hum ko rishta manzur h.
Ab mai kya batau...??
.
.
Ki Mai to bike ko lock karne gaya tha.
k Bachche Ne Shankar
Bhagwanji Se Cycle Mangi,
Pr Use Cycle Nahi Mili To
Usne Mandir Se Ganesh
Murti Churai Aur Ek Letter
Rakh Diya Agar Bachcha
Wapis Chahiye To Cycle Le Anaa.
Bhagwan ne mujhse kaha ki Tu apne Sabhi dosto ko chhod de to "Ferrari" dunga
Maine Bhagwan ko dekha aur kaha ki
He Bhagwan
Ye dost wo h jinhone meri hr khushi hr gam me sath diya
Mere bachpan se lekr aaj tk mere
sath rhe
Kabhi roya to apne hatho se mere ansu pochhe
Ek glass pani b piya to b mere sath share kiya
Meri ek awaz pr dode chle aaye
or aap kehte ho ki me 1 FERRARI ke liye inhe chhod du
KHAIR, Koi baat nahi
Lekin FERRARI Red color ki hi dena
Ek Chaor Ameer Aadmi Ke Ghar
Chori Karne Gaya Tijori Par
Likha Tha Tijori Todne Ki
Jarorat Nahi Hai 452 No Prees
Karke Samne Wala Lal Batan
Dabaye Jaise Hi Batan Daba
Alaram Baja Aur Police Aagye..
Jate Jate Chor Seth Se Bola.
Ab Mera Inshanyat Se Bharosh
Uth Gaya Hai..
THINKING OF BOYS N GIRLZ IN FIRST MEET;):P
Girl: kitna seedha h..!
boy: kya maal h..!
...
...
girl: nice behaviour..!
boy: kash pat jaye..!
..
...
girl: dresing sense zabardast h..!
boy: skirt, top mein or hot lagegi..!
...
....
Girl: agr razi ho gya toh isi se shadi krungi..!
Boy: bs 1 bar han krde muje konse shadi karni
hai..