Mark Twain Quotes, Buffets Quotes

I told you this would happen. But, no, you had to go for the buffet, didn't you?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Buffets Quotes

If man had created man, he would be ashamed of his performance.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Nature Quotes , Men Quotes

Are you so unobservant as not to have found out that sanity and happiness are an impossible combination?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Impossible Quotes

I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, but I won't.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Motivational Quotes , Truth Quotes

A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval. There is nothing more satisfying than that sense of being completely "at home" in your own skin. When you achieve that as a natural state of "being", then you can finally look beyond yourself and fully contribute all your talents to the world.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Life Quotes , Home Quotes

The happy phrasing of a compliment is one of the rarest of human gifts, and the happy delivery of it another.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Flattery Quotes , Compliment Quotes

The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Coffee Quotes , Average Quotes

A person who has a cat by the tail knows a whole lot more about cats than someone who has just read about them.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Cat Quotes , Excellence Quotes

Some things you can't find out; but you will never know you can't by guessing and supposing: no, you have to be patient and go on experimenting until you find out that you can't find out.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Supposing That Quotes , Goes On Quotes

We all do no end of feeling, and we mistake it for thinking.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Indeed, none but the Deity can tell what is good luck and what is bad before the returns are all in.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Good Luck Quotes , Luck Quotes

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Effort Quotes

Twenty-four years ago I was strangely handsome; in San Francisco in the rainy season I was often mistaken for fair weather.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Years Quotes , Weather Quotes

Humor must be one of the chief attributes of God. Plants and animals that are distinctly humorous in form and characteristics are God's jokes.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Animal Quotes

We despise all reverences and all objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Religion Quotes

Humor is like a frog; if you dissect it, it dies.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Frogs Quotes , Dies Quotes

Whatever you have lived, you can write & by hard work & a genuine apprenticeship, you can learn to write well; but what you have not lived you cannot write, you can only pretend to write it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hard Work Quotes , Writing Quotes

I have witnessed and greatly enjoyed the first act of everything which Wagner created, but the effect on me has always been so powerful that one act was quite sufficient; whenever I have witnessed two acts I have gone away physically exhausted; and whenever I have ventured an entire opera the result has been the next thing to suicide.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Travel Quotes , Ass Quotes