Mark Twain Quotes

But old fools is the biggest fools there is.

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It is sound judgment to put on a bold face and play your hand for a hundred times what it is worth; forty-nine times out of fifty nobody dares to call it, and you roll in the chips.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hands Quotes , Play Quotes

I pledged myself to smoke but one cigar a day. I kept the cigar waiting until bedtime, then I had a luxurious time with it. But desire persecuted me every day and all day long. I found myself hunting for larger cigars...within the month my cigar had grown to such proportions I could have used it as a crutch.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hunting Quotes , Long Quotes

Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Inspirational Quotes , Men Quotes

What is there in Rome for me to see that others have not seen before me? What is there for me to touch that others have not touched? What is there for me to feel, to learn, to hear, to know, that shall thrill me before it pass to others? What can I discover?--Nothing. Nothing whatsoever. One charm of travel dies here.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Rome Quotes , Thrill Quotes

I have never taken any exercise, except sleeping and resting, and I never intend to take any. Exercise is loathsome. And it cannot be any benefit when you are tired; and I was always tired.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Taken Quotes , Sleep Quotes

We do not get ice-cream every where, and so, when we do, we are apt to dissipate to excess.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ice Cream Quotes , Ice Quotes

Always obey your parents. When they are present. This is the best policy in the long run. Because if you don't, they will make you. Most parents think they know better than you do, and you can generally make more by humoring that superstition than you can by acting on your own better judgment.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Running Quotes , Thinking Quotes

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Forgiveness Quotes , Death Quotes

You need not expect to get your book right the first time.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Writing Quotes

How slow and still the time did drag along.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Time Quotes , Drag Quotes

Honest poverty is a gem that even a king might be proud to call his own - but I wish to sell out

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kings Quotes , Wish Quotes

The primary rule of business success is loyalty to your employer. That's all right as a theory. What is the matter with loyalty to yourself?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Loyalty Quotes , Business Success Quotes

the size of a misfortune is not determinable by an outsider’s measurement of it but only by the measurements applied to it by the person specially affected by it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Outsiders Quotes , Measurement Quotes

When a man arrives at great prosperity God did it: when he falls into disaster he did it himself.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Failure Quotes , Fall Quotes

Intellectual ''work'' is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Work Quotes , Intellectual Quotes

A historian who would convey the truth has got to lie. Often he must enlarge the truth by diameters, otherwise his reader would not be able to see it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Able Quotes

History has tried hard to teach us that we can't have good government under politicians. Now, to go and stick one at the very head of the government couldn't be wise.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wise Quotes , Government Quotes

Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Friendship Quotes , Happiness Quotes

Now he found out a new thing--namely, that to promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Keeping Promises Quotes , World Quotes