Mark Twain Quotes, History Quotes

It's so damned humiliating.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , History Quotes

We never knew an ignorant person yet but was prejudiced.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Ignorant Quotes

What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

Look at you in war...There has never been a just one, never an honorable one, on the part of the instigator of the war.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Peace Quotes , War Quotes

I hate to hear people say this Judge will vote so and so, because he is a Democrat -- and this one so and so because he is a Republican. It is shameful. The Judges have the Constitution for their guidance; they have no right to any politics save the politics of rigid right and justice when they are sitting in judgment upon the great matters that come before them.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hate Quotes , People Quotes

I was born lazy. I am no lazier now than I was forty years ago, but that is because I reached the limit forty years ago. You can't go beyond possibility.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Years Quotes , Lazy Quotes

Tom said to himself that it was not such a hollow world, after all. He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it -- namely, that in order to make a man or a boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Boys Quotes , Men Quotes

Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Passion Quotes , Abstinence Quotes

I wonder how much it would take to buy a soap bubble, if there were only one in the world.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Soap Bubbles Quotes , World Quotes

As one boy said, 'I was thinking all these horrible thoughts about my parents when suddenly it hit me-if they're all that bad, how come I'm so wonderful'

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Moon Quotes , Men Quotes

A circle is a round straight line with a hole in the middle.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Circles Quotes , Lines Quotes

School gets in the way of my learning.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , School Quotes

There are only two types of speakers in the world. 1. The nervous and 2. Liars.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Liars Quotes , Skills Quotes

It is easier for a cannibal to enter the Kingdom of Heaven through the eye of a rich man's needle that it is for any other foreigner to read the terrible German script.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eye Quotes , Men Quotes

If I had more time, I would have written less.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , More Time Quotes , Written Quotes

You meet people who forget you. You forget people you meet. But sometimes you meet those people you can't forget. Those are your 'friends

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Losing Friends Quotes

I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people, but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Running Quotes

We do not get ice-cream every where, and so, when we do, we are apt to dissipate to excess.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ice Cream Quotes , Ice Quotes