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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- Christianity will doubtless still survive in the earth ten centuries hence- stuffed and in a museum.
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- Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
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- Homely truth is unpalatable.
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- There is only one good sex. The female one.
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- All say, ‘how hard it is that we have to die’ -- a strange complaint to come from the mouths of those who have had to live.
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- That optimist of yours is always ready to turn hell's backyard into a play-ground.
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- Such is professional jealousy; a scientist will never show any kindness for a theory which he did not start himself.
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- Look at the mother of Washington! She raised a boy that could not tell a lie--could not tell a lie! But he never had any chance. It might have been different if he had belonged to the Washington Newspaper Correspondents' Club
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- Whatever you have lived, you can write & by hard work & a genuine apprenticeship, you can learn to write well; but what you have not lived you cannot write, you can only pretend to write it.
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- Never pick a fight with people who buy ink by the barrel.
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- The public is the only critic whose judgment is worth anything at all.
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- The average American may not know who his grandfather was. But the American was, however, one degree better off than the average Frenchman who, as a rule, was in considerable doubt as to who his father was.
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- To me [Edgar Allen Poe's] prose is unreadable—like Jane Austin's [sic]. No there is a difference. I could read his prose on salary, but not Jane's. Jane is entirely impossible. It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death.
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- I am able to say that while I am not ruggedly well, I am not ill enough to excite an undertaker.
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- When we do not know a person - and also when we do - we have to judge his size by the size and nature of his achievements, as compared with the achievements of others in his special line of business - there is no other way.
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- There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one - keep from telling their happiness to the unhappy.
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- But the people cannot have wells, and so they take rain-water. Neither can they conveniently have cellars or graves, the town being built upon "made ground"; so they do without both, and few of the living complain, and none of the others.
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- France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.
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- The silent colossal National Lie that is the support and confederate of all the tyrannies and shams and inequalities and unfairnesses that afflict the peoples — that is the one to throw bricks and sermons at.
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- No one has ever seen a Republican mass meeting that was devoid of the perception of the ludicrous.
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