Mark Twain Quotes, Men Quotes, Imagination Quotes

Man - a figment of God's imagination.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Imagination Quotes

When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them--then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are far apart.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Mean Quotes

What is human life? The first third a good time; the rest remembering about it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Past Quotes , Firsts Quotes

Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Reality Quotes

It is not worth while to strain one's self to tell the truth to people who habitually discount everything you tell them, whether it is true or isn't.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , Self Quotes

This autobiography of mine is a mirror, and I am looking at myself in it all the time. Incidentally I notice the people that pass along at my back - I get glimpses of them in the mirror - and whenever they say or do anything that can help advertise me and flatter me and raise me in my own estimation, I set these things down in my autobiography.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mirrors Quotes , People Quotes

There is this trouble about special providences namely, there is so often a doubt as to which party was intended to be the beneficiary. In the case of the children, the bears, and the prophet, the bears got more real satisfaction out of the episode than the prophet did, because they got the children.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Real Quotes

Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Drinking Quotes , Beer Quotes

The catfish is Plenty good enough fish for anyone

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Good Enough Quotes , Catfish Quotes

The choir always tittered and whispered all through the service. There was once a church choir that was not ill-bred, but I have forgotten where it was.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Church Choir Quotes , Atheism Quotes

To say a compliment well is a high art and few possess it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Art Quotes , Flattery Quotes

I've dealt with many crises in my life, but few will ever happen.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Reality Quotes , Crisis Quotes

Comedy keeps the heart sweet; but we all know that there is wholesome refreshment for both mind and heart in an occasional climb among the pomps of the intellectual snow-summits built by Shakespeare and those others.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sweet Quotes , Heart Quotes

Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Race Quotes , Important Quotes

Trial by jury is the palladium of our liberties. I do not know what a palladium is, but I am sure it is a good thing!

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Liberty Quotes , Trials Quotes

One of my theories is that the hearts of men are about alike, no matter what their skin color.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heart Quotes , Men Quotes

By and by when each nation has 20,000 battleships and 5,000,000 soldiers we shall all be safe and the wisdom of statesmanship will stand confirmed.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Soldier Quotes , Safe Quotes

I'm in favor of progress; it's change I don't like.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Change Quotes , Progress Quotes

I'm the only person who has ever found the right way to build an autobiography.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Way Quotes , Found Quotes

It would not be possible for Noah to do in our day what he was permitted to do in his own ... The inspector would come and examine the Ark, and make all sorts of objections.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes , Ark Quotes