Mark Twain Quotes, Sarcastic Quotes, Somewhere Else Quotes

Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else. This is not advice, it is merely custom.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Somewhere Else Quotes

The truth is a precious commodity. That's why I use it so sparingly.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Use Quotes , Truth Is Quotes

It has been said that a Scotchman has not seen the world until he has seen Edinburgh; and I think that I may say that an American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi Gras in New Orleans.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Thinking Quotes , New Orleans Quotes

A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Food Quotes

When you ascend the hill of prosperity, may you not meet a friend.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , May Quotes

It is a good idea to obey all the rules when you're young just so you'll have the strength to break them when you're old.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ideas Quotes , Breaking Rules Quotes

Public opinion is held in reverence. It settles everything. Some think it is the voice of God.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Thinking Quotes

An adventure is something that while it's happening you wish it wasn't.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Adventure Quotes , Wish Quotes

Geological time is not money.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Time Quotes , Money Quotes

There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Money Quotes

Every time I reform in one direction I go overboard in another.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , One Direction Quotes , Reform Quotes

All our acts, reasoned and unreasoned, are selfish

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The average man don't like trouble and danger.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Average Quotes

In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Spring Quotes , Weather Quotes

It now seems plain to me that that theory ought to be vacated in favor of a new and truer one...the Descent of Man from the Higher Animals.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Animal Quotes , Men Quotes

An Englishman is a person who does things because they have been done before. An American is a person who does things because they haven't been done before.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Doe Quotes

She is not refined. She is not unrefined. She keeps a parrot

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Parrots Quotes

To be human is to have one's little modicum of romance secreted away in one's composition. One never ceases to make a hero of one's self, (in private,) during life, but only alters the style of heroism from time to time as the drifting years belittle certain gods of his admiration and raise up others in their stead.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hero Quotes , Self Quotes

Man has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights...sexual intercourse!...His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sex Quotes , Men Quotes

It takes some little time to accept and realize the fact that while you have been growing old, your friends have not been standing still, in that matter.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Growing Quotes , Littles Quotes