Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humorous Quotes

The funniest things are the forbidden.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Give a small boy a hammer and he will find that everything he encounters needs pounding.

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Tags : Abraham Kaplan Quotes , Children Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.

5 years ago

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There ought to be a room in every house to swear in. It's dangerous to have to repress an emotion like that.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.

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It is our American habit if we find the foundations of our educational structure unsatisfactory to add another story or wing.

5 years ago

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Education Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I think you want a little unofficial help. Three undetected murders in one year won't do, Lestrade. But you handled the Molesey Mystery with less than your usual - that's to say, you handled it fairly well.

5 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

In the long run, every program becomes rococo, and then rubble.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alan Perlis Quotes , Running Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I'm pushing 60 years of age...and that's enough exercise for me.

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I am engaged in answering that Italian buffoon, Mazotti, whose views upon the larval development of the tropical termites have excited my derision and contempt . . .

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

"There are one or two elementary rules to be observed in the way of handling patients," he remarked, seating himself on the table and swinging his legs. "The most obvious is that you must never let them see that you want them. It should be pure condescension on your part seeing them at all; and the more difficulties you throw in the way of it, the more they think of it. Break your patients in early, and keep them well to heel."

5 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

Man usually avoids attributing cleverness to somebody else unless it is an enemy.

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Men Quotes