George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Funny Quotes, Happiness Quotes

A lifetime of happiness! No man alive could bear it: it would be hell on earth.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Happiness Quotes

NAPOLEON: What shall we do with this soldier, Giuseppe? Everything he says is wrong. GIUSEPPE: Make him a general, Excellency, and then everything he says will be right.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The test of good education is seeing how it behaves in a fight.

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Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended.

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A married man forms married habits and becomes dependent on marriage just as a sailor becomes dependent on the sea.

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Every man deserves to be judged in the context of his times.

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It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

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In order to fully realize how bad a popular play can be, it is necessary to see it twice.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

Everything I eat has been proved by some doctor or other to be a deadly poison, and everything I don't eat has been proved to be indispensable for life. But I go marching on.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Food Quotes , Doctors Quotes

Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections, and conceal your own.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Men Quotes , Silence Quotes

If you leave your art, the world will beat you back to it. The world has not an ambition worth sharing, or a prize worth handling.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Art Quotes , Ambition Quotes

A man is like a phonograph with half-a-dozen records. You soon get tired of them all; and yet you have to sit at table whilst he reels them off to every new visitor.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Tired Quotes , Men Quotes

Capitalism drives the employers to do their worst to the employed, and the employed to do the least for them. And it boasts all the time of the incentive it provides to both to do their best! . . . The reason the Capitalist system has worked so far without jamming for more than a few months at a time, and then only in places, is that it has not yet succeeded in making a conquest of human nature so complete that everybody acts on strictly business principles.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Principles Quotes , Incentives Quotes

He never does a proper thing without giving an improper reason for it.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Giving Quotes , Doe Quotes

I love little children too but I don't cut off their heads and stick them in vases.

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Miracles, in the sense of phenomena we cannot explain, surround us on every hand: life itself is the miracle of miracles.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Hands Quotes , Miracle Quotes

I knew if I waited around long enough something like this would happen.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Long Quotes , Enough Quotes

The most sincere form of love is love for food

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An American has no sense of privacy. He does not know what it means.There is no such thing in the country.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Country Quotes , Mean Quotes

What man really wishes to do he will find a means of doing.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Mean Quotes , Men Quotes