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Adam Carolla Quotes
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Adam Carolla Quotes 142
- Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Passion Quotes , Office Quotes
- No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians; I'm just not a reader.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Book Quotes , Comedian Quotes
- Having sex without a condom is like riding a roller coaster with diarrhea. You can't just throw your hands up and enjoy it.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sex Quotes
- It's like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , July Quotes
- I have no connection with Hollywood. I'm not interested. I don't care.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Hollywood Quotes , Connections Quotes
- Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Gay Quotes , Looks Quotes
- I used to be a Democrat, now I'm basically a Republican.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Republican Quotes , Used Quotes
- I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Podcasting Quotes , Form Quotes
- When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Basketball Quotes , Brother Quotes
- My first car was a motorcycle.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Car Quotes , Motorcycle Quotes
- If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Joy Quotes
- It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes
- I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , People Quotes , Laughing Quotes
- People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Dream Quotes , People Quotes
- If you spend your life walking through somebody else's museum, you never find out whether you're Rembrandt or not.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Museums Quotes , Walking Quotes
- I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sorry Quotes , Night Quotes
- I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Fields Quotes
- All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- Everyone keeps saying, "Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating." It's like saying, "How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt?" I don't care.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes