Adam Carolla Quotes, Comedian Quotes

I'm a comedian, not a politician.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Comedian Quotes

The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Reading Quotes , Book Quotes

I like radio and live performing stuff. I don't like the television stuff as much.

6 years ago

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You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.

6 years ago

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Honestly, I've always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed - that kind of stuff.

6 years ago

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I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.

6 years ago

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I've never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I've never left behind.

6 years ago

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That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sports Quotes , Dream Quotes

When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mean Quotes , Should Have Quotes

That's an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever?

6 years ago

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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.

6 years ago

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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It's a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.

6 years ago

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Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bother me. I'm an atheist!

6 years ago

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I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Feelings Quotes , Trying Quotes

People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity.

6 years ago

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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , People Quotes , Laughing Quotes

I am semi-ambivalent about being on camera - sort of low-key. I don't like being on camera stuff that much. I like radio and live performing stuff. I don't like the television stuff as much. Some people do. It takes a certain breed of cat. There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader. Being a poor reader was enough to make me not want to do that type of formatted show.

6 years ago

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My first car was a motorcycle.

6 years ago

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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Shapes Quotes , Way Quotes