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  • Adam Carolla Quotes   142
  • My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mom Quotes , Kind Quotes
  • I'd be at someone's house or be up on the roof all day and I'd get lonely - stir crazy - and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life. But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn't imagine it.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lonely Quotes
  • When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the 'tardiest of the 'tards like the thick crust.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Country Quotes , Feet Quotes
  • In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Nice Quotes , Dirty Quotes