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Adam Carolla Quotes
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Adam Carolla Quotes 142
- I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.
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- Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.
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- Honestly, I've always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed - that kind of stuff.
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- When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the 'tardiest of the 'tards like the thick crust.
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- Don’t do your best, do my best.
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- Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bother me. I'm an atheist!
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- I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.
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- It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.
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- I spoke to my dad, and he said it took close to 90 dollars to raise me. But that was me and my sister, and my sister moved out when she was 16, so sometimes it can knock you up to triple digits to raise a kid.
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- People are stupid. There's a lot of dumb stuff that's successful.
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- Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
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- I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I've worked with women, I've never had an issue with women.
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- Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
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- He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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- California is like the hot blond high school chick who's been getting by on her looks, but now she's 45 and falling apart.
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- I swear my car won't run unless I'm picking my nose: At least, I'm that superstitious about it, so I don't want to take any chances.
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- A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money. Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money - do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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- All's the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.
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- I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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- I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.
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