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Adam Carolla Quotes 142

It should be like a salmon taking to open water. I've done so much morning radio that I won't be overwhelmed by it, but it's still going to be a challenge.

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6 years ago

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I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.

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6 years ago

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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.

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6 years ago

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No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.

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6 years ago

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Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything; they just don't vote that way.

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6 years ago

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I don't normally vote. I'm lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.

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6 years ago

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Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.

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6 years ago

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I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.

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6 years ago

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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!

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6 years ago

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It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.

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6 years ago

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Figure out what to do, then take a nap.

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6 years ago

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The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don't have a compelling host then you have nothing.

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6 years ago

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If you spend your life walking through somebody else's museum, you never find out whether you're Rembrandt or not.

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6 years ago

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The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.

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6 years ago

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There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.

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6 years ago

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I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they're making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.

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6 years ago

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People who fail, excel at avoiding opportunity.

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6 years ago

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The very definition of 'beauty' is outside.

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6 years ago

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I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.

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6 years ago

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I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.

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6 years ago

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