Mark Twain Quotes, Ignorance Quotes, Men Quotes

Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Men Quotes

It's lovely to live on a raft. We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Stars Quotes , Sky Quotes

I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There is a great difference between feeding parties to wild beasts and stirring up their finer feelings in an inquisition. One is the system of degraded barbarians, the other of enlightened civilized people.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Party Quotes , Civilization Quotes

How empty is theory in the presence of fact!

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We do not get ice-cream every where, and so, when we do, we are apt to dissipate to excess.

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Our heroes are men who do things which we recognize, with regret, and sometimes with a secret shame, that we cannot do.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Regret Quotes , Hero Quotes

Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Nothing is made in vain, but the fly came near it.

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But we are all insane, anyway ... The suicides seem to be the only sane people.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Suicide Quotes , Suicidal Quotes

I repeat, sir, that in whatever position you place a woman she is an ornament to society and a treasure to the world. As a sweetheart, she has few equals and no superiors; as a cousin, she is convenient; as a wealthy grandmother with an incurable distemper, she is precious; as a wet-nurse, she has no equal among men. What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Cousin Quotes , Grandmother Quotes

Man is the only religious animal. In the Holy task of smoothing his brother's path to the happiness of heaven, he has turned the globe into a graveyard.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Brother Quotes

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Drinking Quotes , Alcohol Quotes

Customs do not concern themselves with right or wrong or reason. But they have to be obeyed; one reasons all around them until he is tired, but he must not transgress them, it is sternly forbidden.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Tired Quotes , Reason Quotes

Bridgeport?" Said I. "Camelot," Said he.

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The Mississippi River will always have its own way; no engineering skill can persuade it to do otherwise.

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I could forgive the boy, now, if he'd committed a million sins!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Forgiveness Quotes , Boys Quotes

Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Success Quotes

Word it as softly as you please, the spirit of patriotism is the spirit of the dog and wolf. The moment there is a misunderstanding about a boundary line or a hamper of fish or some other squalid matter, see patriotism rise, and hear him split the universe with is war-whoop. The spirit of patriotism being in its nature jealous and selfish, is just in man's line, it comes natural to him - he can live up to all its requirements to the letter; but the spirit of Christianity is not in its entirety possible to him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dog Quotes , Selfish Quotes

Greece is a bleak, unsmiling desert, without agriculture, manufactures or commerce, apparently. What supports its poverty-stricken people or its Government, is a mystery.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Government Quotes , Agriculture Quotes