Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Kindness Quotes

Never refuse to do a kindness unless the act would work great injury to yourself, and never refuse to take a drink - under any circumstances.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kindness Quotes

A dream...I was trying to explain to St. Peter, and was doing it in the German tongue, because I didn't want to be too explicit.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dream Quotes , Trying Quotes

He said that man’s heart was the only bad heart in the animal kingdom; that man was the only animal capable of feeling malice, envy, vindictiveness, revengefulness, hatred, selfishness, the only animal that loves drunkenness, almost the only animal that could endure personal uncleanliness and a filthy habitation, the sole animal in whom was fully developed the base instinct called patriotism, the sole animal that robs, persecutes, oppresses and kills members of his own tribe, the sole animal that steals and enslaves the members of any tribe.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heart Quotes , Animal Quotes

If all men were rich, all men would be poor.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Money Quotes , Men Quotes

isn't so astonishing, the number of things that I can remember, as the number of things I can remember that aren't so.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Numbers Quotes , Remember Quotes

Kings cannot ennoble thee, thou good, great soul, for One who is higher than kings hath done that for thee; but a king can confirm thy nobility to men.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kings Quotes , Men Quotes

To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Life Quotes

No one has ever seen a Republican mass meeting that was devoid of the perception of the ludicrous.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Perception Quotes , Republican Quotes

While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Cat Quotes , People Quotes

Choosing not to read is like closing an open door to paradise

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Doors Quotes , Paradise Quotes

Apparently one of the most uncertain things in the world is the funeral of a religion.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funeral Quotes , Religion Quotes

'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do it a grain at a time, not the whole idea at once.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Glasses Quotes , Ideas Quotes

He was endowed with a stupidity which by the least little stretch would go around the globe four times and tie.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ties Quotes , Stupidity Quotes

Education is what you must acquire without any interference from your schooling.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Education Quotes , Schooling Quotes

It was on the 10th day of May - 1884 - that I confessed to age by mounting spectacles for the first time, and in the same hour I renewed my youth, to outward appearance, by mounting a bicycle for the first time. The spectacles stayed on.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Age Quotes , May Quotes

As I slowly grow wise I briskly grow cautious.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wise Quotes , Grows Quotes

Never be haughty to the humble, never be humble to the haughty.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Humble Quotes

Truth is stranger than fiction-to some people, but I am measurably familiar with it.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , People Quotes

Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hope Quotes , Tree Quotes