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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- The human race was always interesting and we know by its past that it will always continue so, monotonously.
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- Senator: Person who makes laws in Washington when not doing time.
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- I am only human, although I regret it.
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- ...one should be gentle with the ignorant, for they are the chosen of God.
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- whenever the literary german dives into a sentence, this is the last you are going to see of him till he emerges on the other side of his atlantic with his verb in his mouth.
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- What is the real function, the essential function, the supreme function, of language? Isn't it merely to convey ideas and emotions? Certainly. Then if we can do it with words of fonetic brevity and compactness, why keep the present cumbersome forms?
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- My father was a Saint Bernard, my mother was a Collie, but I am a Presbyterian.
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- A soiled baby with a neglected nose cannot be conscientiously regarded as a thing of beauty.
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- Wit and Humor - if any difference, it is in duration - lightning and electric light. Same material, apparently; but one is vivid, and can do damage - the other fools along and enjoys elaboration.
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- The Church has opposed every innovation and discovery from the day of Galileo down to our own time, when the use of anesthetics in childbirth was regarded as a sin because it avoided the biblical curse pronounced against Eve.
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- A man can be a Christian or a patriot, but he can't legally be a Christian and a patriot - except in the usual way: one of the two with the mouth, the other with the heart.
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- The physician who knows only medicine, knows not even medicine.
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- Taking the pledge will not make bad liquor good, but it will improve it.
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- When you catch an adjective, kill it - perhaps the best possible advice for budding writers.
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- I do see that there is an argument against suicide: the grief of the worshipers left behind, the awful famine in their hearts, these are too costly terms for the release.
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- It{California} is the land where the fabled Aladdin's Lamp lies buried-and she {San Francisco} is the new Aladdin who shall seize it from its obscurity and summon the genie and command him to crown her with power and greatness and bring to her feet the hoarded treasures of the earth.
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- If we only had some God in the country's laws, instead of being in such a sweat to get him into the Constitution, it would be better all around.
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- If you are with the quality, or at a funeral, or trying to go to sleep when you ain't sleepy - if you are anywheres where it won't do for you to scratch, why you will itch all over in upwards of a thousand places.
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- Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.
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- There ain't no way to find out why a snorer can't hear himself snore.
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