George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Funny Quotes, Change Quotes

Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.

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What use are cartridges in battle? I always carry chocolate instead.

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We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.

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The way to deal with worldly people is to frighten them by repeating their scandalous whisperings aloud.

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Life is a disease; and the only difference between on man and another is the stage of the disease at which he lives.

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Few people think more than two or three times a year; I have made an international reputation for myself by thinking once or twice a week.

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The open mind never acts: when we have done our utmost to arrive at a reasonable conclusion, we still must close our minds for the moment with a snap, and act dogmatically on our conclusions.

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He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

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Get married, but never to a man who is home all day.

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The function of comedy is to dispelunconsciousness by turning the searchlight of the keenest moral and intellectual analysisright on to it.

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Whenever an obviously well founded statement is made in England by a person specially well acquainted with the facts, that unlucky person is instantly and frantically contradicted by all the people who obviously know nothing about it.

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The universal regard for money is the one hopeful fact in our civilization. Money is the most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honor, generosity and beauty . . . . Not the least of its virtues is that it destroys basic people as certainly as it fortifies and dignifies noble people.

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The harder I work the more I live.

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Take care to get what you like or you will be forced to like what you get.

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Use your health, even to the point of wearing it out.

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A Native American elder once described his own inner struggles in this manner: Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time. When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, The one I feed the most.

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Doing what needs to be done may not make you happy, but it will make you great.

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You are my inspiration and my folly. You are my light across the sea, my million nameless joys, and my day's wage. You are my divinity, my madness, my selfishness, my transfiguration and purification. You are my rapscallionly fellow vagabond, my tempter and star. I want you.

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We are not taught to think decently on sex subjects, and consequently we have no language for them except indecent language.

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Be as romantic as you please about love ... but you mustn't be romantic about money.

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