Mark Twain Quotes, Employment Quotes, Honest Quotes

So I became a newspaperman. I hated to do it but I couldnt find honest employment.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Employment Quotes , Honest Quotes

Where every man in a state has a vote, brutal laws are impossible.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Law Quotes

Ah, if he could only die temporarily!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dies Quotes

Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Passion Quotes , Abstinence Quotes

When the world is made to be idiot-proof, the world will become overpopulated with idiots.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , World Quotes , Idiot Quotes

Duties are not performed for duty's sake, but because their neglect would make the man uncomfortable. A man performs but one duty - the duty of contenting his spirit, the duty of making himself agreeable to himself.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Accountability Quotes

When a humorist ventures upon the grave concerns of life he must do his job better than another man or he works harm to his cause.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Men Quotes

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Writing Quotes

I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Humorous Quotes

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government and the sure and gradual deterioration of the public morals.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Graduation Quotes , Party Quotes

Man is the only animal that is cruel. It kills just for the sake of it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Peace Quotes , War Quotes

I have seen an entire family lifted out of poverty and into affluence by the simple boon of a broken leg. I have had people come to me on crutches, with tears in their eyes, to bless this beneficient institution. In all my experiences of life, I have seen nothing so seraphic as the look that comes into a freshly mutilated man's face when he feels in his vest pocket with his remaining hand and finds his accident ticket all right.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eye Quotes , Simple Quotes

Manifestly, dying is nothing to a really great and brave man.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Men Quotes

I was a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things, and I knowed it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Two Quotes , Forever Quotes

Is it, perhaps, possible that there are two kinds of Civilization-one for home consumption and one for the heathen market?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Home Quotes , Civilization Quotes

Genius has no youth, but starts with the ripeness of age and old experience.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Age Quotes , Genius Quotes

It is a good and gentle religion, but inconvenient.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hinduism Quotes , Gentle Quotes

The signs of excessive indulgence in this destructive pastime are easily detectable. They are these: A disposition to eat, to drink, to smoke, to meet together convivially, to laugh, to joke, and tell indelicate stories— and mainly, a yearning to paint pictures.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Laughing Quotes , Together Quotes

As a rule we develop a borrowed European idea forward, and ... Europe develops a borrowed American idea backwards.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Europe Quotes , Ideas Quotes

There's always a hole in theories somewhere if you look close enough.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Looks Quotes , Enough Quotes