Mark Twain Quotes, Talking Quotes, Cows Quotes

It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Talking Quotes , Cows Quotes

Simple rules for saving money: To save half, when you are fired by an eager impulse to contribute to a charity, wait and count to forty. To save three quarters, count sixty. To save all, count sixty-five.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Simple Quotes , Waiting Quotes

The writing begins when you’ve finished. Only then do you know what you’re trying to say.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Trying Quotes

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Cat Quotes

Our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Independence Quotes

when we badly want a thing, we go to hunting for good and righteous reasons for it; we give it that fine name to comfort our consciences, whereas we privately know we are only hunting for plausible ones.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hunting Quotes , Names Quotes

When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them--then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are far apart.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Mean Quotes

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

History never repeats itself; at best it sometimes rhymes.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , History Quotes , Sometimes Quotes

What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Men Quotes

I do see that there is an argument against suicide: the grief of the worshipers left behind, the awful famine in their hearts, these are too costly terms for the release.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Suicide Quotes , Grief Quotes

I pledged myself to smoke but one cigar a day. I kept the cigar waiting until bedtime, then I had a luxurious time with it. But desire persecuted me every day and all day long. I found myself hunting for larger cigars...within the month my cigar had grown to such proportions I could have used it as a crutch.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hunting Quotes , Long Quotes

It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Senior Quotes

No child should be permitted to grow up without exercise for imagination. It enriches life for him. It makes things wonderful and beautiful.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Beautiful Quotes , Children Quotes

There is a sumptuous variety about the New England weather... In the spring I have counted one hundred and twenty-six different kinds of weather inside of four and twenty hours.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Spring Quotes , Weather Quotes

Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Change Quotes , Loyalty Quotes

I was born modest; not all over, but in spots.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Born Quotes , Spots Quotes

I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Years Quotes

Look at the mother of Washington! She raised a boy that could not tell a lie--could not tell a lie! But he never had any chance. It might have been different if he had belonged to the Washington Newspaper Correspondents' Club

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mother Quotes , Truth Quotes

Faith is believing things you know aint true

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes