Mark Twain Quotes, German Language Quotes, Awful Quotes

In early times some sufferer had to sit up with a toothache, and he put in the time inventing the German language.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , German Language Quotes , Awful Quotes

Except a person be part coward, it is not a compliment to say he is brave.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Courage Quotes , Brave Person Quotes

Let us be grateful to Adam: he cut us out of the blessing of idleness and won for us the curse of labor.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Work Quotes , Grateful Quotes

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Beer Quotes

I used to think my father was an idiot, until I turned twenty-one... Then I thought he was a genus.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Thinking Quotes

If a person offends you, and you are in doubt as to whether it was intentional or not, do not resort to extreme measures; simply watch your chance, and hit him with a brick.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Doubt Quotes , Watches Quotes

What a world of trouble those who never marry escape! There are many happy matches, it is true, and sometimes "my dear," and "my love" come from the heart; but what sensible bachelor, rejoicing in his freedom and years of discretion, will run the tremendous risk?

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Marriage Quotes , Running Quotes

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Religious Quotes

Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eccentric Quotes , Virtue Quotes

'Don't you worry, and don't you hurry.' I know that phrase by heart, and if all other music should perish out of the world it would still sing to me.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Heart Quotes

In America-as elsewhere-free speech is confined to the dead.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , America Quotes

To eat is human, to digest, divine

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humanity Quotes , Divine Quotes

We don't care to eat toadstools that think they are truffles.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Food Quotes , Thinking Quotes

I cannot see the short, white curls Upon the forehead of an Ox, But what I see them dripping with That poor thing's blood, and hear the ax; When I see calves and lambs, I see Them led to death; I see no bird Or rabbit cross the open field But what a sudden shot is heard; A shout that tells me men aim true, For death or wound, doth chill me through. W.H. Davies I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Animal Quotes , Men Quotes

There is no accounting for human beings.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humans Quotes , Accounting Quotes

After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; ... I should be sorry to have that voice fall silent and pass out of my life.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sorry Quotes , Fall Quotes

Most people can't bear to sit in church for an hour on Sundays. How are they supposed to live somewhere very similar to it for eternity?

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Atheist Quotes

She is not refined. She is not unrefined. She keeps a parrot

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Parrots Quotes

We were good boys, good Presbyterian boys, and loyal and all that; anyway, we were good Presbyterian boys when the weather was doubtful; when it was fair, we did wander a little from the fold.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Boys Quotes , Weather Quotes

It is a mystery that is hidden from me by reason that the emergency requiring the fathoming of it hath not in my life-days occurred, and so, not having no need to know this thing, I abide barren of the knowledge.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Needs Quotes , Emergencies Quotes