Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, America Quotes

It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , America Quotes

To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, "Our Country, right or wrong," and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Religious Quotes

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Custom is, to think a handsome thing in private but tame it down in the utterance.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Utterance Quotes

I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, of ungraceful and gilded forms of charitable and unselfish lying.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Beautiful Quotes , Lying Quotes

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Cat Quotes

I am not given to exaggeration, and when I say a thing I mean it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mean Quotes , Given Quotes

But the elastic heart of youth cannot be compressed into one constrained shape long at a time.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heart Quotes , Long Quotes

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Inspirational Quotes

Custom is petrification, nothing but dynamite can dislodge it for a century.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Tradition Quotes , Century Quotes

What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes

Strip the human race, absolutely naked, and it would be a real democracy. But the introduction of even a rag of tiger skin, or a cowtail, could make a badge of distinction and be the beginning of a monarchy.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Real Quotes , Race Quotes

To me [Edgar Allen Poe's] prose is unreadable—like Jane Austin's [sic]. No there is a difference. I could read his prose on salary, but not Jane's. Jane is entirely impossible. It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Differences Quotes , Austin Quotes

The xmas holidays have this high value: that they remind Forgetters of the Forgotten, & repair damaged relationships.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Xmas Quotes , Holiday Quotes

The newspaper that obstructs the law on a trivial pretext, for money's sake, is a dangerous enemy to the public weal. That awful power, the public opinion of a nation, is created in America by a horde of ignorant, self-complacent simpletons who failed at ditching and shoemaking and fetched up in journalism on their way to the poorhouse.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Self Quotes , Media Quotes

It is a dear and lovely disposition, and a most valuable one, that can brush away indignities and discourtesies and seek and find the pleasanter features of an experience.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Optimistic Quotes , Lovely Quotes

A powerful agent is the right word. Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words in a book or newspaper the resulting effect is physical as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Spiritual Quotes , Powerful Quotes

There's plenty of boys that will come hankering and gruvvelling around when you've got an apple, and beg the core off you; but when they're got one, and you beg for the core, and remind them how you give them a core one time, they take a mouth at you, and say thank you 'most to death, but there ain't a-going to be no core.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Boys Quotes , Apples Quotes