Mark Twain Quotes, Children Quotes, Fall Quotes

Whenever he was out of luck and a little down-hearted, he would fall to mourning over the loss of a wonderful cat he used to own (for where women and children are not, men of kindly impulses take up with pets, for they must love something)

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Fall Quotes

I was dead for millions of years before I was born and it never inconvenienced me a bit.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Suicide Quotes

When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Kentucky, because everything there happens 20 years after it happens anywhere else.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kentucky Quotes , Years Quotes

Gratitude and treachery are merely the two extremities of the same procession. You have seen all of it that is worth staying for when the band and the gaudy officials have gone by.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Gratitude Quotes , Two Quotes

I can live for two months on a good compliment.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Life Quotes

When a person is accustomed to one hundred and thirty-eight in the shade, his ideas about cold weather are not valuable.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eight Quotes , Weather Quotes

Adam was the luckiest man in the world. He had no mother-in-law.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mother Quotes , Men Quotes

We laugh and laugh. Then cry and cry- Then feebler laugh, Then die.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Laughing Quotes , Cry Quotes

The government is merely a servant―merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Government Quotes , Order Quotes

I would much prefer to suffer from the clean incision of an honest lancet than from a sweetened poison.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Honesty Quotes , Suffering Quotes

The fact is, the king was a good deal more than a king, he was a man; and when a man is a man, you can't knock it out of him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kings Quotes , Men Quotes

The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Bible Quotes , Reading Quotes

The church is always trying to get other people to reform, it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way of example

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Ideas Quotes

Some men worship rank, some worship heroes, some worship power, some worship God, and over these ideals they dispute-but they all worship money.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Money Quotes , Hero Quotes

A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditch digging.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Digging Quotes , World Quotes

Men think they think upon the great political questions, and they do; but they think with their party, not independently; they read its literature, but not that of the other side

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Party Quotes , Men Quotes

When a man stands on the verge of seventy-two you know perfectly well that he never reached that place without knowing what this life is - heartbreaking bereavement.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Two Quotes

I am an anti-imperialist. I am opposed to having the eagle put its talons on any other land.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , War Quotes , Eagles Quotes

Written things are not for speech; their form is literary; they are stiff, inflexible, and will not lend themselves to happy and effective delivery with the tongue-where their purpose is to merely entertain, not instruct; they have to be limbered up, broken up, colloquialized and turned into common forms of premeditated talk-otherwise they will bore the house and not entertain it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Broken Quotes , House Quotes

Custom is custom: it is built of brass, boiler-iron, granite; facts, reasonings, arguments have no more effect upon it than the idle winds have upon Gibraltar.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wind Quotes , Iron Quotes