Mark Twain Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes

Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

If work were so pleasant, the rich would keep it for themselves.

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I have traveled more than anyone else, and I have noticed that even the angels speak English with an accent.

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You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Bed Quotes

Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.

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Optimist: day-dreamer in his small clothes.

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I am not an economist. I am an honest man!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Honesty Quotes , Humorous Quotes

How slow and still the time did drag along.

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The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Want Quotes

Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.

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We can secure other people's approval, if we do right and try hard; but our own is worth a hundred of it, and no way has been found out of securing that.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Carpe Diem Quotes , Self Quotes

Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session.

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The Book of Mormon is chloroform in print

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If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be — a Christian.

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I never could keep a promise. I do not blame myself for this weakness, because the fault must lie in my physical organization. It is likely that such a very liberal amount of space was given to the organ which enables me to make promises that the organ which should enable me to keep them was crowded out. But I grieve not. I like no half-way things. I had rather have one faculty nobly developed than two faculties of mere ordinary capacity.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Grieving Quotes

The blunting effects of slavery upon the slaveholder's moral perceptions are known and conceded the world over; and a priveleged class, an aristocracy, is but a band of slaveholders under another name.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Class Quotes , Names Quotes

There are no accidents, all things have a deep and calculated purpose; sometimes the methods employed by Providence seem strange and incongruous, but we have only to be patient and wait for the result: then we recognize that no others would have answered the purpose, and we are rebuked and humbled.

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Human beings can be awful cruel to one another.

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The partitions of the houses were so thin we could hear the women occupants of adjoining rooms changing their minds.

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Man never creates, he only recombines the lines and colors of his own existance.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Color Quotes