Nobody really likes to be lectured a lot. And, therefore, if you want to be an effective person, what you don't do is scold the person publicly all the time.
You must have some vision for your life. Even if you don't know the plan, you have to have a direction in which you choose to go... You want to be in the driver's seat of your own life because if you are not, life will drive you.
Why do so many people chose to spend their whole life destroying paths they didn't even want to follow, instead of following the one path that would lead them somewhere.