George W. Bush Quotes, Humor Quotes, America Quotes

We're now interested in finding those who may attack America and arrest them before they do. We've had over nearly a thousand people have been detained in America and questioned about their motives and their intentions.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , America Quotes

You'll hear people say it's racist to test. Folks, it's racist not to test. Because guess who gets shuffled through the system oftentimes? Children whose parents don't speak English as a first language, inner-city kids. It's so much easier to quit on somebody than to remediate.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Children Quotes , Humor Quotes

I am mindful of the difference between the executive branch and the legislative branch. I assured all four of these leaders that I know the difference, and that difference is they pass the laws and I execute them.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Law Quotes

I don't have to accept their tenants. I was trying to convince those college students to accept my tenants. And I reject any labeling me because I happened to go to the university.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , College Quotes

It is not Reaganesque to support a tax plan that is Clinton in nature.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Support Quotes

I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is 'If it feels good - stop.'

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

To give law enforcement the additional tools it needs to track down terror here at home.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Home Quotes , Humor Quotes

Humor, to be comprehensible to anybody, must be built upon a foundation with which he is familiar. If he can't see the foundation the superstructure is to him merely a freak -- like the Flatiron building without any visible means of support -- something that ought to be arrested.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Mean Quotes

The true and lasting genius of humour does not drag you thus to boxes labelled 'pathos,' 'humour,' and show you all the mechanism of the inimitable puppets that are going to perform. How I used to laugh at Simon Tapperwit, and the Wellers, and a host more! But I can't do it now somehow; and time, it seems to me, is the true test of humour. It must be antiseptic.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Laughing Quotes

I've never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I've never left behind.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they're so suggestible.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

This administration is doing everything we can to end the stalemate in an efficient way. We're making the right decisions to bring the solution to an end.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Decision Quotes

The point is, this is a way to help inoculate me about what has come and is coming.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Political Quotes

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and it holds the world together.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oprah Winfrey Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Humor is the great thing, the saving thing after all. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations, and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Yield Quotes

Wit is the lowest form of humor.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Alexander Pope Quotes , Humor Quotes , Literature Quotes

If you look at a group of people that had faith, it's got to be the Jews. They followed Moses through the desert for 40 years with no map. There had to be one guy in the back, like, 'I don't think he knows where he's going.'

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Everyone keeps saying, "Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating." It's like saying, "How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt?" I don't care.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

We need to have mentoring programs energized by government, paid for by government, but who exist not because of government. Teen Challenge is a way to get people off drugs and alcohol. Teen Challenge is a faith-based program that changes people's hearts.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Heart Quotes , Humor Quotes