Mark Twain Quotes, Sarcastic Quotes, Party Quotes

Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Party Quotes

The same passions in man and woman nonetheless differ in tempo; hence man and woman do not cease misunderstanding one another.

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Relationship Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

People do not deserve to have good writing, they are so pleased with bad.

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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Only Lawyers and mental defectives are automatically exempt for jury duty.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Law Quotes

PROPERTY, n. Any material thing, having no particular value, that may be held by A against the cupidity of B. Whatever gratifies the passion for possession in one and disappoints it in all others. The object of man's brief rapacity and long indifference.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Passion Quotes

However, it is always nice to be expected, and not to arrive.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Don't give a woman advice; one should never give a woman anything she can't wear in the evening.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

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Tags : A. Whitney Brown Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Jobs Quotes

Sarcastic Science, she would like to know, In her complacent ministry of fear, How we propose to get away from here When she has made things so we have to go Or be wiped out. Will she be asked to show Us how by rocket we may hope to steer To some star off there, say, a half light-year Through temperature of absolute zero? Why wait for Science to supply the how When any amateur can tell it now? The way to go away should be the same As fifty million years ago we came- If anyone remembers how that was I have a theory, but it hardly does.

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Stars Quotes

A wit with dunces, and a dunce with wits.

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Tags : Alexander Pope Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Dunces Quotes

Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Sex Quotes

We have the best government that money can buy.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Their demeanor is invariably morose, sullen, clownish and repulsive. I should think there is not, on the face of the earth, a people so entirely destitute of humor, vivacity, or the capacity for enjoyment.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Thinking Quotes

It's easier to replace a dead man than a good picture.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

America is one long expectoration.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , America Quotes

PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Tools Quotes

A modest little person, with much to be modest about.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Life Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes