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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.
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- TAKE, v.t. To acquire, frequently by force but preferably by stealth.
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- Homicide, /n./ The slaying of one human by another. There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy, but it makes no great difference to the person slain whether he died by one kind or another - the classification is for the advantage of the lawyers.
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- PROVIDENTIAL, adj. Unexpectedly and conspicuously beneficial to the person so describing it.
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- When you have made a catalogue of your friend's faults it is only fair to supply him with a duplicate, so that he may know yours.
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- FORCE, n. "Force is but might," the teacher said p/ "That definition's just."/ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ "Force is not might but must!"
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- A popular character in old Italian plays, who imitated with ludicrous incompetence the "buffone", or clown, and was therefore the ape of an ape; for the clown himself imitated the serious characters of the play.
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- OVATION, n. n ancient Rome, a definite, formal pageant in honor of one who had been disserviceable to the enemies of the nation. A lesser "triumph."
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- LAST, n. A shoemaker's implement, named by a frowning Providence as opportunity to the maker of puns.
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- PRESENTABLE, adj. Hideously appareled after the manner of the time and place.
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- DECIDE, v.i. To succumb to the preponderance of one set of influences over another set.
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- Appeal. In law, to put the dice into the box for another throw.
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- A single swallow, it is said, devours ten millions of insects every year. The supplying of these insects I take to be a signal instance of the Creator's bounty in providing for the lives of His creatures.
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- Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
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- Scribbler, n. A professional writer whose views are antagonistic to one's own.
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- ENTERTAINMENT, n. Any kind of amusement whose inroads stop short of death by injection.
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- A bad marriage is like an electrical thrilling machine: it makes you dance, but you can't let go.
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- RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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- Birth: The first and direst of all disasters.
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- critic, n. A person who boasts himself hard to please because nobody tries to please him.
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