Adolphus Busch Quotes, Money Quotes, Humorous Quotes

You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adolphus Busch Quotes , Money Quotes , Humorous Quotes

He appeared to enjoy beyond everything the sound of his own voice. I couldn't wonder at that, for it was mellow and full and gave great importance to every word he uttered. He listened to himself with obvious satisfaction and sometimes gently beat time to his own music with his head or rounded a sentence with his hand.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I think you want a little unofficial help. Three undetected murders in one year won't do, Lestrade. But you handled the Molesey Mystery with less than your usual - that's to say, you handled it fairly well.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

A God who cannot smile, could not have created this humorous universe.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Sri Aurobindo Quotes , God Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fitness Quotes , Humorous Quotes

He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Life Quotes , Humorous Quotes

"It's an old habit of mine, Wal'r," said the Captain, "any time these fifty year. When you see Ned Cuttle bite his nails, Wal'r, then you may know that Ned Cuttle's aground."

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Poetry's unnat'ral; no man ever talked poetry 'cept a beadle on boxin' day, or Warren's blackin' or Rowland's oil, or some o' them low fellows; never you let yourself down to talk poetry, my boy.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Our civilization has decided that determining the guilt or innocence of men is a thing too important to be trusted to trained men. When it wants a library catalogued, or the solar system discovered, or any trifle of that kind, it uses up its specialists. But when it wishes anything done which is really serious, it collects twelve of the ordinary men standing round. The same thing was done, if I remember right, by the Founder of Christianity.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Well, I'm a bacteriologist, you know. I live in a nine-hundred-diameter microscope. I can hardly claim to take serious notice of anything that I can see with my naked eye.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Eye Quotes

In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Doctors Quotes

There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

Brothers are a blessing for one thing. There is no possibility of any young lady getting unreasonably conceited if she be endowed with them.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Brother Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I occasionally get birthday cards from fans. But it's often the same message: They hope it's my last.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Al Forman Quotes , Birthday Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I was always treated as if I had insisted on being born, in opposition to the dictates of reason, religion, and morality, and against the dissuadinig arguments of my best friends.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If you could see my legs when I take my boots off, you'd form some idea of what unrequited affection is.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Everyone is in favor of free speech. Hardly a day passes without its being extolled, but some people's idea of it is that they are free to say what they like, but if anyone else says anything back, that is an outrage.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Business Quotes , Humorous Quotes