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Humorous Quotes
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Humorous Quotes 192
- He hadn’t a single redeeming vice.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Vices Quotes
- An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes
- I occasionally get birthday cards from fans. But it's often the same message: They hope it's my last.
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Tags : Al Forman Quotes , Birthday Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I'm pushing 60 years of age...and that's enough exercise for me.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Exercise Quotes
- Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Inspiring Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- In Paris, the greatest expression of personal satisfaction known to man is the smirk on the face of a male, highly pleased with himself as he leaves the boudoir of a lady.
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Tags : Honore De Balzac Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I have my own views about Nature's methods, though I feel that it is rather like a beetle giving his
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Nature Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I am not an economist. I am an honest man!
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Honesty Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Let me see you ride a donkey over my green again, and as sure as you have a head upon your shoulders, I'll knock your bonnet off, and tread upon it!
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- He had never seen a woman doctor before, and his whole conservative soul rose up in revolt at the idea. He could not recall any biblical injunction that the man should remain ever the doctor and the woman the nurse, and yet he felt as if a blasphemy had been committed.
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Biblical Quotes
- "She's a very charming and delightful creature," quoth Mr. Robert Sawyer, in reply; "and has only one fault that I know of, Ben. It happens, unfortunately, that that single blemish is a want of taste. She don't like me."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Mr. and Mrs. Boffin sat staring at mid-air, and Mrs. Wilfer sat silently giving them to understand that every breath she drew required to be drawn with a self-denial rarely paralleled in history.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- The unexpected has happened so continually in my life that it has ceased to deserve the name.
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes
- She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.
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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Stories Quotes
- "Oh!" said my aunt, "I was not aware at first to whom I had the pleasure of objecting."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- For your popular rumour, unlike the rolling stone of the proverb, is one which gathers a deal of moss in its wanderings up and down.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes