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Humorous Quotes
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Humorous Quotes 192
- I observe the physician with the same diligence as the disease.
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Tags : John Donne Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.
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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Marriage Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Living, as I do, in an educated and scientific atmosphere, I could not have conceived that the first principles of zoology were so little known. Is it possible that you do not know the elementary fact in comparative anatomy, that the wing of a bird is really the forearm, while the wing of a bat consists of three elongated fingers with membranes between?
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes
- An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes
- ... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Liars Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- There are no grades of vanity; there are only grades of ability in concealing it.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Vanity Quotes
- Atlee is a very modest man. And with reason.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Men Quotes
- "The twins no longer derive their sustenance from Nature's founts - in short," said Mr. Micawber, in one of his bursts of confidence, "they are weaned..."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- They spell it da Vinci and pronounce it da Vinchy. Foreigners always spell better than they pronounce.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Travel Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- No orator can top the one who can give good nicknames.
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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- The humorous story is American, the comic story is English, the witty story is French. The humorous story depends for its effect upon the manner of the telling;the comic and the witty story upon the matter.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I feel that there is reason lurking in you somewhere, so we will patiently grope round for it.
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes
- Some medical beast had revived tar-water in those days as a fine medicine, and Mrs. Joe always kept a supply of it in the cupboard; having a belief in its virtues correspondent to its nastiness. At the best of times, so much of this elixir was administered to me as a choice restorative, that I was conscious of going about, smelling like a new fence.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Always obey your parents - when they are present.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- There ought to be a room in every house to swear in. It's dangerous to have to repress an emotion like that.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- There is no such passion in human nature, as the passion for gravy among commercial gentlemen.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Let us swear while we may, for in heaven it will not be allowed
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Don't you drink? I notice you speak slightingly of the bottle. I have drunk since I was fifteen and few things have given me more pleasure.
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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes