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Humorous Quotes
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Humorous Quotes 192
- Humor is also a way of saying something serious.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- An absence of antecedents and of relatives is sometimes an aid rather than an impediment to social advancement . . .
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes
- She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.
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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- "It's an old habit of mine, Wal'r," said the Captain, "any time these fifty year. When you see Ned Cuttle bite his nails, Wal'r, then you may know that Ned Cuttle's aground."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- But soft you, the fair Ophelia: Ope not thy ponderous and marble jaws, But get thee to a nunnery - go!
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Ophelia Quotes
- There are no grades of vanity; there are only grades of ability in concealing it.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Vanity Quotes
- No orator can top the one who can give good nicknames.
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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Because of its vitality, the computing field is always in desperate need of new cliches: Banality soothes our nerves.
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Tags : Alan Perlis Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Technology Quotes
- She dotes on poetry, sir. She adores it; I may say that her whole soul and mind are wound up, and entwined with it. She has produced some delightful pieces, herself, sir. You may have met with her 'Ode to an Expiring Frog,' sir.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- ... Waiter! raw beef-steak for the gentleman's eye,-nothing like raw beef-steak for a bruise, sir; cold lamp-post very good, but lamp-post inconvenient-damned odd standing in the open street half-an-hour, with your eye against a lamp.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- It is no harm to be an ass, if one is content to bray and not kick.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Always obey your parents - when they are present.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I have attended operas, whenever I could not help it, for fourteen years now; I am sure I know of no agony comparable to the listening to an unfamiliar opera.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.
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Tags : Mahatma Gandhi Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Mr. and Mrs. Boffin sat staring at mid-air, and Mrs. Wilfer sat silently giving them to understand that every breath she drew required to be drawn with a self-denial rarely paralleled in history.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Humor is also a way of saying something serious.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I decided to stop drinking with creeps. I decided to drink only with friends. I've lost 30 pounds.
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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Drinking Quotes
- There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.
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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes