William Shakespeare Quotes, Humorous Quotes, Silence Quotes

Talkers are no good doers.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Silence Quotes

The devil is not, indeed, perfectly humorous, but that is only because he is the extreme of all humor.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Samuel Taylor Coleridge Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Devil Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Goresthorpe Grange is a feudal mansion - or so it was termed in the advertisement which originally brought it under my notice. Its right to this adjective had a most remarkable effect upon its price, and the advantages gained may possibly be more sentimental than real. Still, it is soothing to me to know that I have slits in my staircase through which I can discharge arrows; and there is a sense of power in the fact of possessing a complicated apparatus by means of which I am enabled to pour molten lead upon the head of the casual visitor.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Real Quotes , Humorous Quotes

... Waiter! raw beef-steak for the gentleman's eye,-nothing like raw beef-steak for a bruise, sir; cold lamp-post very good, but lamp-post inconvenient-damned odd standing in the open street half-an-hour, with your eye against a lamp.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Inspiring Quotes , Humorous Quotes

And yet the motives of women are so inscrutable. You remember the woman at Margate whom I suspected for the same reason. No powder on her nose - that proved to be the correct solution. How can you build on such a quicksand? Their most trivial action may mean volumes, or their most extraordinary conduct may depend upon a hairpin or a curling tongs.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Mean Quotes

The house was as empty as a beer closet in premises where painters have been at work.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Beer Quotes

But Rosa soon made the discovery that Miss Twinkleton didn't read fairly. She cut the love-scenes, interpolated passages in praise of female celibacy, and was guilty of other glaring pious frauds.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fitness Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The unexpected has happened so continually in my life that it has ceased to deserve the name.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

One dumb-bell, Watson! Consider an athlete with one dumb-bell. Picture to yourself the unilateral development - the imminent danger of a spinal curvature. Shocking, Watson, shocking!

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Athlete Quotes

The proverb says, "Born lucky, always lucky," and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for one or two of our lads (per annum) to get drowned in the Mississippi or in Bear Creek, but I was pulled out in a 2/3 drowned condition 9 times before I learned to swim, and was considered to be a cat in disguise.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I observe the physician with the same diligence as the disease.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : John Donne Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

In Paris, the greatest expression of personal satisfaction known to man is the smirk on the face of a male, highly pleased with himself as he leaves the boudoir of a lady.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Honore De Balzac Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Some medical beast had revived tar-water in those days as a fine medicine, and Mrs. Joe always kept a supply of it in the cupboard; having a belief in its virtues correspondent to its nastiness. At the best of times, so much of this elixir was administered to me as a choice restorative, that I was conscious of going about, smelling like a new fence.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes