Mark Twain Quotes, Liars Quotes, Humorous Quotes

... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Liars Quotes , Humorous Quotes

When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Inspiring Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.

5 years ago

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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

An absence of antecedents and of relatives is sometimes an aid rather than an impediment to social advancement . . .

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

The funniest things are the forbidden.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I was always treated as if I had insisted on being born, in opposition to the dictates of reason, religion, and morality, and against the dissuadinig arguments of my best friends.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A politician needs the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn't happen.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Our civilization has decided that determining the guilt or innocence of men is a thing too important to be trusted to trained men. When it wants a library catalogued, or the solar system discovered, or any trifle of that kind, it uses up its specialists. But when it wishes anything done which is really serious, it collects twelve of the ordinary men standing round. The same thing was done, if I remember right, by the Founder of Christianity.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The devil is not, indeed, perfectly humorous, but that is only because he is the extreme of all humor.

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Tags : Samuel Taylor Coleridge Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Devil Quotes

My uncle, Mr. Stephen Maple, had been at the same time the most successful and the least respectable of our family, so that we hardly knew whether to take credit for his wealth or to feel ashamed of his position.

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Uncles Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If you can't get a compliment any other way, pay yourself one.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Self Esteem Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A God who cannot smile, could not have created this humorous universe.

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Tags : Sri Aurobindo Quotes , God Quotes , Humorous Quotes

...it is not necessary to the child to awaken to the sense of the strange and humorous by giving a man a luminous nose...to the child it is sufficiently strange and humorous to have a nose at all.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Children Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A joke is a very serious thing.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If you go on with this nuclear arms race, all you are going to do is make the rubble bounce.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Fun Quotes , Humorous Quotes

She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.

5 years ago

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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes