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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- A sin takes on a new and real terror when there seems a chance that it is going to be found out.
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- A man may plan as much as he wants to, but nothing of consequence is likely to come of it until the magician circumstance steps in and takes the matter off his hands.
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- If we learned to walk and talk the way we learn to read and write, everyone would limp and stutter.
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- Authorship is not a trade, it is an inspiration; authorship does not keep an office, its habitation is all out under the sky, and everywhere the winds are blowing and the sun is shining and the creatures of God are free.
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- When one reads Bibles, one is less surprised at what the Deity knows than at what He doesn't know.
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- It was on the 10th day of May - 1884 - that I confessed to age by mounting spectacles for the first time, and in the same hour I renewed my youth, to outward appearance, by mounting a bicycle for the first time. The spectacles stayed on.
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- Denial is much more then an Egyptian River.
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- The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.
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- No one has ever seen a Republican mass meeting that was devoid of the perception of the ludicrous.
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- Necessity is the mother of taking chances.
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- The pulpit and the optimist are always talking about the human race's steady march toward ultimate perfection. As usual, they leave out the statistics. It is the pulpit's way - the optimist's way.
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- God was left out of the Constitution but was furnished a front seat on the coins of the country.
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- No child should be permitted to grow up without exercise for imagination. It enriches life for him. It makes things wonderful and beautiful.
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- Moralists and philosophers have adjudged those who throw temptation in the way of the erring, equally guilty with those who are thereby led into evil
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- If we were meant to talk more than listen, we would have two mouths and one ear.
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- The human race consists of the damned and the ought-to-be damned.
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- When your watch gets out of order you have choice of two things to do: throw it in the fire or take it to the watch-tinker. The former is the quickest.
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- If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
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- The trouble with the world is not that people know too little; it's that they know so many things that just aren't so.
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- Not until you become a stranger to yourself will you be able to make acquaintance with the Friend.
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