Mark Twain Quotes, Idiot Quotes, Evidence Quotes

No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Idiot Quotes , Evidence Quotes

You can't break a bad habit by throwing it out the window. You've got to walk it slowly down the stairs.

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When the human race has once acquired a superstition, nothing short of death is ever likely to remove it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Race Quotes , Superstitions Quotes

You want to be very careful about lying; otherwise you are nearly sure to get caught.

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All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Compassion Quotes

Simple rules for saving money: To save half, when you are fired by an eager impulse to contribute to a charity, wait and count to forty. To save three quarters, count sixty. To save all, count sixty-five.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Simple Quotes , Waiting Quotes

The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.

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... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.

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Be good and you will be lonely.

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Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

I prefer milk because I am a Prohibitionist, but I do not go to it for inspiration.

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Let us swear while we may, for in heaven it will not be allowed

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I have a religion-but you will call it blasphemy. It is that there is a God for the rich man but none for the poor.....Perhaps your religion will sustain you,will feed you-I place no dependence in mine. Our religions are alike, though, in one respect-neither can make a man happy when he is out of luck.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Happy Quotes

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Inspirational Quotes

Tea is an affront to lunch and an insult to dinner.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lunch Quotes , Tea Quotes

When you feel like tellin a feller to go to the devil - tell him to go to Chicago - it'll anser every purpose, and is perhaps, a leetle more expensive.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Devil Quotes , Chicago Quotes

Medicine has made all its progress during the past fifty years. ... How many operations that are now in use were known fifty years ago?-they were not operations, they were executions.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Science Quotes , Past Quotes

Courage is not the lack of fear. It is acting in spite of it.

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The water is clearer than the air, and the air is the air that angels breathe.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Angel Quotes , Air Quotes

Adam was but human—this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple's sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden. The mistake was in not forbidding the serpent; then he would have eaten the serpent.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Apples Quotes