Mark Twain Quotes, Jobs Quotes, Men Quotes

When a humorist ventures upon the grave concerns of life he must do his job better than another man or he works harm to his cause.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Men Quotes

Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.

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Do good when you can, and charge when you think they will stand it.

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When the world is made to be idiot-proof, the world will become overpopulated with idiots.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , World Quotes , Idiot Quotes

Man is the only animal that is cruel. It kills just for the sake of it.

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Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.

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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

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Memories which someday will become all beautiful when the last annoyance that encumbers them shall have faded out of our minds.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Beautiful Quotes , Memories Quotes

There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.

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Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.

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My heart goes out to anyone who is making his first appearance before an audience of human beings.

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A German joke is no laughing matter.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Laughing Quotes , Matter Quotes

In the space of one hundred and seventy-six years the Mississippi has shortened itself two hundred and forty-two miles. Therefore, in the Old Silurian Period the Mississippi River was upward of one million three hundred thousand miles long, seven hundred and forty-two years from now the Mississippi will be only a mile and three-quarters long. There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesome returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Years Quotes , Two Quotes

The best of us would rather be popular than right.

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There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Art Quotes , Philosophy Quotes

Out of the depths of my happy heart wells a great tide of love and prayer for this priceless treasure that is confided to my lifelong keeping. You cannot see its waves as they flow toward you, darling, but in these lines you will hear...the distant beating of its surf.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Cute Quotes

It were not best that we should all think alike.

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Imagination labors best in distant fields.

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There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.

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We have the best government that money can buy.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes