Mark Twain Quotes, Past Quotes, Firsts Quotes

What is human life? The first third a good time; the rest remembering about it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Past Quotes , Firsts Quotes

If God is what people say there can be no one in the universe so unhappy as He; for He sees unceasingly myriads of His creatures suffering unspeakable miseries--and besides this foresees how they are going to suffer during the remainder of their lives. One might as well say, "As unhappy as God."

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , People Quotes

A proud man is one who waits for a vacancy in the Trinity.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Waiting Quotes

Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Mother Quotes

I am persuaded that the world has been tricked into adopting some false and most pernicious notions about consistency - and to such a degree that the average man has turned the rights and wrongs of things entirely around and is proud to be "consistent," unchanging, immovable, fossilized, where it should be his humiliation.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Rights Quotes

Italy is the home of art and swindling; home of religion and moral rottenness

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Art Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

A circle is a round straight line with a hole in the middle.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Circles Quotes , Lines Quotes

Don't explain your author, read him right and he explains himself.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes

This is the year 1492. I am eighty-two years of age. The things I am going to tell you are things which I saw myself as a child and as a youth.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Book Quotes

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

The problem with education is school.

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I have been born more times than anybody except Krishna.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Novelists Quotes

Beautiful credit! The foundation of modern society.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Beautiful Quotes , Foundation Quotes

The reason why truth is so much stranger than fiction is that there is no requirement for it to be consistent.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fiction Quotes , Requirements Quotes

Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Prosperity Quotes

There are only two forces that can carry light to all the corners of the globe... the sun in the heavens and the Associated Press down here.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Business Quotes , Light Quotes

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform. "It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for certain that just ain't true." Thinking that you know the future.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Finding Yourself Quotes

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dog Quotes , Cat Quotes

More than once I had seen a noble who had gotten his enemy at a disadvantage stop to pray before cutting his throat.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Prayer Quotes , Cutting Quotes

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Cat Quotes