Mark Twain Quotes, Drinking Quotes, Beer Quotes

Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Drinking Quotes , Beer Quotes

The problem with education is school.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , School Quotes

Our opinions do not really blossom into fruition until we have expressed them to someone else.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fruition Quotes

A pilot must have a memory developed to absolute perfection. But there are two higher qualities which he also must have. He must have good and quick judgment and decision, and a cool, calm courage that no peril can shake.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Memories Quotes , Two Quotes

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A person who has during all time maintained the imposing position of spiritual head of four-fifths of the human race, and political head of the whole of it, must be granted the possession of executive abilities of the loftiest order.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Spiritual Quotes , Race Quotes

A few fly bites cannot stop a spirited horse.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , Spirited Quotes

I was born modest, but it didn't last.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lasts Quotes , Moral Quotes

A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Food Quotes

When ill luck begins, it does not come in sprinkles, but in showers.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Luck Quotes , Doe Quotes

A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Success Quotes

I have always been rather better treated in San Francisco than I actually deserved.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , San Francisco Quotes

Man is without doubt the most interesting fool there is. He concedes that God made the angels immune from pain and death, and that he could have been similarly kind to man, but denies that he was under any moral obligation to do so.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pain Quotes , Angel Quotes

The institution of royalty in any form is an insult to the human race.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Humility Quotes

Age enlarges and enriches the powers of some musical instruments - notably those of the violin - but it seems to set a piano's teeth on edge.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Piano Quotes , Musical Quotes

If you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Newspapers Quotes , Uninformed Quotes

There is no security in life, only opportunity.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Opportunity Quotes

My brother had just been appointed Secretary of Nevada Territory--an office of such majesty that it concentrated in itself the duties and dignities of Treasurer, Comptroller, Secretary of State, and Acting Governor in the Governor's absence. A salary of eighteen hundred dollars a year and the title of "Mr. Secretary," gave to the great position an air of wild and imposing grandeur. I was young and ignorant, and I envied my brother.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Brother Quotes , Book Quotes

In other localities certain places in the streams are much better than others, but at Niagara one place is just as good as another, for the reason that the fish do not bite anywhere.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fishing Quotes , Reason Quotes

A new oath holds pretty well; but... when it is become old, and frayed out, and damaged by a dozen annual retryings of its remains, it ceases to be serviceable; any little strain will snap it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , New Year Quotes , Holiday Quotes