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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- A popular author is one who writes what the people think. Genius invites them to think something else.
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- Finance is the art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager
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- Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
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- Consult: To seek approval for a course of action already decided upon.
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- PROJECTILE, n. The final arbiter in international disputes. With the growth of prudence in military affairs the projectile came more and more into favor, and is now held in high esteem by the most courageous.
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- Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.
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- PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking the pocket through the scalp. It consists in locating and exploiting the organ that one is a dupe with.
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- RITE, n. A religious or semi-religious ceremony fixed by law, precept or custom, with the essential oil of sincerity carefully squeezed out of it.
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- The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.
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- If you would be accounted great by your contemporaries, be not too much greater than they.
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- LIMB, n. The branch of a tree or the leg of an American woman.
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- CALUMNUS, n. A graduate of the School for Scandal.
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- Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.
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- SACRED, adj. Dedicated to some religious purpose; having a divine character; inspiring solemn thoughts or emotions; as... the Cow in India; the Crocodile, the Cat and the Onion of ancient Egypt.
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- A comely female inhabiting the Mohammedan Paradise to make things cheery for the good Mussulman, whose belief in her existence marks a noble discontent with his earthly spouse, whom he denies a soul.
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- HOSPITALITY, n. The virtue which induces us to feed and lodge certain persons who are not in need of food and lodging.
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- A revolution is a violent change of mismanagement.
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- RAILROAD, n. The chief of many mechanical devices enabling us to get away from where we are to where we are no better off. For this purpose the railroad is held in highest favor by the optimist, for it permits him to make the transit with great expedition.
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- Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
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- Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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