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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- ADDER, n. A species of snake. So called from its habit of adding funeral outlays to the other expenses of living.
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- OWE, v. To have (and to hold) a debt. The word formerly signified not indebtedness, but possession; it meant "own," and in the minds of debtors there is still a good deal of confusion between assets and liabilities.
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- Men who expect universal peace through invention of destructive weapons of war are no wiser than one who, noting the improvement of agricultural implements, should prophesy an end to the tilling of the soil.
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- MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.
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- hybrid, n. A pooled issue.
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- APHORISM, n. Predigested wisdom. The flabby wine-skin of his brain Yields to some pathologic strain, And voids from its unstored abysm The driblet of an aphorism. "The Mad Philosopher," 1697
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- HOSPITALITY, n. The virtue which induces us to feed and lodge certain persons who are not in need of food and lodging.
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- The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forebearance among men.
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- Strive not for singularity in dress; Fools have the more and men of sense the less. To look original is not worth while, But be in mind a little out of style.
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- Duck-bill, n. Your account at your restaurant during the canvas-back season.
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- LIAR, n. One who tells an unpleasant truth.
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- Immoral" is the judgment of the stalled ox on the gamboling lamb.
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- ACKNOWLEDGE, v.t. To confess. Acknowledgment of one another's faults is the highest duty imposed by our love of truth.
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- REPENTANCE, n. The faithful attendant and follower of Punishment. It is usually manifest in a degree of reformation that is not inconsistent with continuity of sin.
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- REDRESS, n. Reparation without satisfaction.
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- Revolution, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.
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- BRANDY, n. A cordial composed on one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.
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- IMPROVIDENCE, n. Provision for the needs of to-day from the revenues of to-morrow.
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- Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.
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- MESMERISM, n. Hypnotism before it wore good clothes, kept a carriage and asked Incredulity to dinner.
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