Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Graduation Quotes, School Quotes

CALUMNUS, n. A graduate of the School for Scandal.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Graduation Quotes , School Quotes

PROJECTILE, n. The final arbiter in international disputes. With the growth of prudence in military affairs the projectile came more and more into favor, and is now held in high esteem by the most courageous.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Courage Quotes , Military Quotes

Slang is a foul pool at which every dunce fills his bucket, and then sets up as a fountain.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Buckets Quotes , Pool Quotes

Distress: A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Disease Quotes , Prosperity Quotes

TARIFF, n. A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Greed Quotes , Tariffs Quotes

WEAKNESSES, n.pl. Certain primal powers of Tyrant Woman wherewith she holds dominion over the male of her species, binding him to the service of her will and paralyzing his rebellious energies.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Tyrants Quotes , Weakness Quotes

Achievement; the death of endeavor and the birth of disgust.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Success Quotes , Death Quotes

A popular writer writes about what people think. A wise writer offers them something to think about.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wise Quotes , Writing Quotes

MACE, n. A staff of office signifying authority. Its form, that of a heavy club, indicates its original purpose and use in dissuading from dissent.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Office Quotes , Purpose Quotes

plagiarism, n. A literary coincidence compounded of a discreditable priority and an honorable subsequence.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Priorities Quotes , Coincidence Quotes

MONAD, n. The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter (see Molecule). The monad has body without bulk, and mind without manifestation - containing all the powers and possibilities needful to his evolution into a German philosopher . .

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mind Quotes , Molecules Quotes

A chop is a piece of leather skillfully attached to a bone and administered to the patients at restaurants.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Cooking Quotes

Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Friendship Quotes , Happiness Quotes

Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , God Quotes

Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Selfish Quotes , Selfishness Quotes

TAKE, v.t. To acquire, frequently by force but preferably by stealth.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Force Quotes , Stealth Quotes

HOMŒOPATHIST, n. The humorist of the medical profession.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Science Quotes , Medical Profession Quotes

Pertaining to a certain order of architecture, otherwise known as Normal American. Most of the public buildings of the United States are of the Ramshackle order, though some of our earlier architects preferred the Ironic. Recent additions to the White House in Washington are Theo-Doric, the ecclesiastic order of the Dorians. They are exceedingly fine and cost one hundred dollars a brick.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Order Quotes , White Quotes

The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Clever Quotes

SYCOPHANT- One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Greatness Quotes , Editors Quotes