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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- MALTHUSIAN, adj. Pertaining to Malthus and his doctrines, who believed in artificially limiting population, but found that it could not be done by talking. Herod of Judea, all the famous soldiers have been practical exponents of the Malthusian idea.
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- Magpie, n.: A bird whose theivish disposition suggested to someone that it might be taught to talk.
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- PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining to the philosophy of Socrates. Platonic Love is a fool's name for the affection between a disability and a frost.
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- Hope is an explorer who surveys the country ahead. That is why we know so much about the Hereafter and so little about the Heretofore.
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- Truth - An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance.
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- HASH: There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.
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- PROPERTY, n. Any material thing, having no particular value, that may be held by A against the cupidity of B. Whatever gratifies the passion for possession in one and disappoints it in all others. The object of man's brief rapacity and long indifference.
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- PASTIME, n. A device for promoting dejection. Gentle exercise for intellectual debility.
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- QUORUM, n. A sufficient number of members of a deliberative body to have their own way and their own way of having it. In the U.S. Senate a quorum consists of the chairman of the Committee on Finance and a messenger from the White House.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , White Quotes , Numbers Quotes
- TENACITY, n. A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hands Quotes , Careers Quotes
- MONAD, n. The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter (see Molecule). The monad has body without bulk, and mind without manifestation - containing all the powers and possibilities needful to his evolution into a German philosopher . .
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- REAR, n. In American military matters, that exposed part of the army that is nearest to Congress.
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- Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.
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- He laughs best who laughs least.
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- QUIXOTIC, adj. Absurdly chivalric, like Don Quixote. An insight into the beauty and excellence of this incomparable adjective is unhappily denied to him who has the misfortune to know that the gentleman's name is pronounced Ke-ho-tay.
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- Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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- Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket.
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- KING, n. A male person commonly known in America as a "crowned head," although he never wears a crown and has usually no head to speak of.
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- A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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- Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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