George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Men Quotes, Aquariums Quotes

My situation is a solemn one: life is offered to me on the condition of eating beefsteaks. But death is better than cannibalism. My will contains directions for my funeral, which will be followed, not by mourning coaches, but by oxen, sheep, flocks of poultry, and a small traveling aquarium of live fish, all wearing white scarves in honor of the man who perished rather than eat his fellow creatures. It will be, without the exception of Noah's Ark, the most remarkable thing of its kind ever seen.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Men Quotes , Aquariums Quotes

Every profession is a conspiracy against the laity.

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Experience fails to teach where there is no desire to learn.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Teacher Quotes , Teaching Quotes

Civilization is a disease produced by the practice of building societies with rotten material.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Practice Quotes , Civilization Quotes

Very few people can afford to be poor.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , People Quotes

Don't waste time collecting other people's autographs; rather devote it to making your own autograph worth collecting.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , People Quotes , Waste Quotes

What a heartbreaking job it is trying to combine authors for their own protection... the first lesson I learned was that when you take the field for the authors you will be safer without a breastplate than without a backplate.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Trying Quotes

You have learnt something. That always feels at first as if you had lost something.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Education Quotes

Never resist temptation: prove all things: hold fast that which is good.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Biblical Quotes , Temptation Quotes

Telling the truth is the funniest joke in the world.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Boxing Quotes , World Quotes

It is long and hard and painful to create life: it is short and easy to steal the life others have made.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Long Quotes , Painful Quotes

Without danger I cannot be great. That is how I pay for Abel's blood. Danger and fear follow my steps everywhere. Without them courage would have no sense. And it is courage, courage, courage that raises the blood of life to crimson splendor.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Blood Quotes , Abel Quotes

Vitality is a woman is a blind fury of creation.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Women Quotes , Vitality Quotes

Even to this day it is easier than it ought to be for me to get a rise out of an American by telling him something about himself which is equally true about every human being on the face of the globe. He at once resents this as a disparagement and an assertion on my part that people in other parts of the globe are not like that, and are loftily superior to such weaknesses.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , People Quotes , Weakness Quotes

If any religion had a chance of ruling over England, nay Europe within the next hundred years, it could be Islam.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Years Quotes , Europe Quotes

It would positively be a relief to me to dig Shakespeare up and throw stones at him.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Writing Quotes , Relief Quotes

The wheels are turning, but the hamsters are all dead. Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot. I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes it.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Dirty Quotes , Long Ago Quotes

A doctor's reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

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Man can climb to the highest summits, but he cannot dwell there long.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Wise Quotes

You have set up in New York Harbor a monstrous idol which you call Liberty. The only thing that remains to complete that monument is to put on its pedestal the inscription written by Dante on the gate of hell: All hope abandon ye who enter here.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , New York Quotes , Idols Quotes