A. P. Herbert Quotes, Thinking Quotes, Looks Quotes

A high-brow is someone who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Looks Quotes

aven, I have given up smoking again!... God! I feel fit. Homicidal, but fit. A different man. Irritable, moody, depressed, rude, nervy, perhaps; but the lungs are fine.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Men Quotes , Smoking Quotes

Don't let's go to the dogs tonight, For mother will be there.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Mother Quotes , Dog Quotes

An act of God was defined as something which no reasonable man could have expected.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Hope Quotes , Men Quotes

If nobody said anything unless he knew what he was talking about, a ghastly hush would descend upon the earth.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Life Quotes , Learning Quotes

Well, fancy giving money to the Government! Might as well have put it down the drain.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Business Quotes , Government Quotes

An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Purpose Quotes

The rain is plentious but, by God's decree, Only a third is meant for you and me; Two-thirds are taken by the growing things Or vanish Heavenward on vapour's wings: Nor does it mathematically fall With social equity on one and all. The population's habit is to grow In every region where the water's low: Nature is blamed for failings that are Man's, And well-run rivers have to change their plans.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Running Quotes , Rain Quotes

The essence of humour is surprise; that is why you laugh when you see a joke in Punch.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Essence Quotes , Laughing Quotes

Let's find out what everyone is doing, And then stop everyone from doing it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes

The critical period of matrimony is breakfast-time.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Marriage Quotes , Time Quotes

People must not do things for fun. We are not here for fun. There is no reference to fun in any Act of Parliament.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

There is no reason why a joke should not be appreciated more than once. Imagine how little good music there would be if, for example, a conductor refused to play Beethoven's Fifth Symphony on the ground that his audience might have heard it before.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Play Quotes , Symphony Quotes

The Common Law of England has been laboriously built about a mythical figure-the figure of 'The Reasonable Man'.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

For I must write to The Times tonight, and save the world from sin.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Writing Quotes , Tonight Quotes

The concept of two people living together for 25 years without a serious dispute suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

As my poor father used to say In 1963, Once people start on all this Art Goodbye, moralitee! And what my father used to say Is good enough for me.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Goodbye Quotes , Art Quotes

Greenfly, it's difficult to see Why God, who made the rose, made thee.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Rose Quotes , Made Quotes

Justice should be cheap but judges expensive.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Justice Quotes , Judging Quotes

My ball is in a bunch of fern, A jolly place to be; An angry man is close astern- He waves his club at me. Well, let him wave-the sky is blue; Go on, old ball, we are but two-We may be down in three, Or nine-or ten-or twenty-five-It matters not; to be alive, Is good enough for me.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Golf Quotes , Men Quotes