Adam Carolla Quotes, Nuts Quotes, Car Quotes

I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Nuts Quotes , Car Quotes

I spoke to my dad, and he said it took close to 90 dollars to raise me. But that was me and my sister, and my sister moved out when she was 16, so sometimes it can knock you up to triple digits to raise a kid.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dad Quotes

If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Bridges Quotes , Done Quotes

I'd be at someone's house or be up on the roof all day and I'd get lonely - stir crazy - and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life. But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn't imagine it.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lonely Quotes

I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Podcasting Quotes , Form Quotes

Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Basketball Quotes

The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, "Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome."

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Daughter Quotes , Mother Quotes

The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Reading Quotes , Book Quotes

Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Shapes Quotes , Way Quotes

Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Smell Quotes , Judging Quotes

I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Pie Quotes

Well, the post office is probably not the place you want to go if you want to be infused with patriotism and a renewed sense of vigor.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Passion Quotes , Office Quotes

Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Air Quotes , Stories Quotes

I am not a good cue card reader.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Cards Quotes

No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes

If you've driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it's like a golf course... Real estate values go 'boom!'

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Real Quotes , Golf Quotes

Rich people don't pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes - they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn't pay taxes.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , People Quotes , Pay Quotes

That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sports Quotes , Dream Quotes

I don't normally vote. I'm lazy and I never bought into the every vote counts.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Lazy Quotes

I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Hurt Quotes , Nice Quotes