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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- The altar cloth of one aeon is the doormat of the next.
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- Truth is neither alive nor dead; it just aggravates itself all the time.
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- Humor must be one of the chief attributes of God. Plants and animals that are distinctly humorous in form and characteristics are God's jokes.
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- The English are mentioned in the Bible; Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
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- That optimist of yours is always ready to turn hell's backyard into a play-ground.
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- It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.
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- The source of all humor is not laughter, but sorrow.
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- I'm the only person who has ever found the right way to build an autobiography.
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- After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; ... I should be sorry to have that voice fall silent and pass out of my life.
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- A sin takes on a new and real terror when there seems a chance that it is going to be found out.
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- To create man was a quaint and original idea, but to add the sheep was tautology.
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- I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me.
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- Difference between savage and civilized man: one is painted, the other gilded.
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- How stunning are the changes which age makes in a man while he sleeps!
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- That is the way we are made: we don't reason, where we feel; we just feel.
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- The human race consists of the damned and the ought-to-be damned.
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- What a lie it is to call this a free country, where none but the unworthy and undeserving may swear.
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- Suddenly the nickel-clad horse takes the bit in its mouth and goes slanting for the curbstone defying all prayers and all your powers to change its mind - your heart stands still, your breath hangs fire, your legs forget to work.
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- Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world.
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- Good judgement is the result of experience and experience the result of bad judgement.
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