George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Funny Quotes, Senior Quotes

The only time my education was interrupted was when I was in school.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Senior Quotes

The first condition of understanding a foreign country is to smell it.

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Tags : Rudyard Kipling Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

We are living in 1937, and our universities, I suggest, are not half-way out of the fifteenth century. We have made hardly any changes in our conception of university organization, education, graduation, for a century - for several centuries.

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Tags : H. G. Wells Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I had to have a brace because I had big teeth. If I'd gone to Africa I would have got poached.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alan Carr Quotes , Funny Quotes , Teeth Quotes

Out upon merry Christmas! What's Christmas time to you but a time for paying bills without money; a time for finding yourself a year older, but not an hour richer...? If I could work my will," said Scrooge indignantly, "every idiot who goes about with 'Merry Christmas' upon his lips should be boiled with his won pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. He should!

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Christmas Quotes

Familiarity breeds contempt. How accurate that is. The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity to get familiar with it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Respect Quotes

We take greater pains to persuade others that we are happy than in endeavoring to think so ourselves

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Tags : Confucius Quotes , Funny Quotes , Happiness Quotes

It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kings Quotes

If you cry ''Forward'' you must be sure to make clear the direction in which to go. Don't you see that if you fail to do that and simply call out the word to a monk and a revolutionary, they will go in precisely opposite directions?

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Tags : Anton Chekhov Quotes , Funny Quotes , Failure Quotes

I have imbibed such a love for money that I keep some sequins in a drawer to count, and cry over them once a week.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

We spent as much money as we could and got as little for it as people could make up their minds to give us. We were always more or less miserable, and most of our acquaintance were in the same condition. There was a gay fiction among us that we were constantly enjoying ourselves, and a skeleton truth that we never did. To the best of my belief, our case was in the last aspect a rather common one.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

If you send a damned fool to St. Louis, and you don't tell them he's a damned fool, they'll never find out.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

He was by no means opposed to hard labour on principle, for he would work away at a cricket-match by the day together, - running, and catching, and batting, and bowling, and revelling in toil which would exhaust a galley-slave.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Running Quotes

One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best.

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Tags : Alan Shearer Quotes , Funny Quotes , Soccer Quotes

Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

If you want something said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.

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Tags : Margaret Thatcher Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

We think our fathers fools, so wise we grow. Our wiser sons, no doubt will think us so.

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Tags : Alexander Pope Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wise Quotes