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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.
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- INK, n. A villainous compound of tannogallate of iron, gum-arabic, and water, chiefly used to facilitate the infection of idiocy and promote intellectual crime.
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- SEINE, n. A kind of net for effecting an involuntary change of environment. For fish it is made strong and coarse, but women are more easily taken with a singularly delicate fabric weighted with small, cut stones.
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- To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
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- If you want to read a perfect book there is only one way: write it.
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- Example is better than following it.
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- ORATORY, n. A conspiracy between speech and action to cheat the understanding. A tyranny tempered by stenography.
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- The best kind of onion soup is the simplest kind.
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- MAGNETISM, n. Something acting upon a magnet. The two definitions immediately foregoing are condensed from the works of one thousand eminent scientists, who have illuminated the subject with a great white light, to the inexpressible advancement of human knowledge.
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- aim, n. The task we set our wishes to.
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- In this world one must have a name; it prevents confusion, even when it does not establish identity. Some, though, are known by numbers, which also seem inadequate distinctions.
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- In the algebra of psychology, X stands for a woman's heart.
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- WASHINGTONIAN, n. A Potomac tribesman who exchanged the privilege of governing himself for the advantage of good government. In justice to him it should be said that he did not want to.
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- REVOLUTION, n. A bursting of the boilers which usually takes place when the safety valve of public discussion is closed.
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- Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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- me, pro. The objectionable case of I. The personal pronoun in English has three cases, the dominative, the objectionable and the oppressive. Each is all three.
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- Brain: an apparatus with which we think that we think. Mind, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain.
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- Houseless: Having paid all taxes on household goods.
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- diplomacy, n.: The patriotic art of lying for one's country.
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- Self-evident, adj. Evident to one's self and to nobody else.
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