Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Silence Quotes, Ears Quotes

Noise: a stench in the ear.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Silence Quotes , Ears Quotes

COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Money Quotes , Pockets Quotes

An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance. Discovery of truth is the sole purpose of philosophy, which is the most ancient occupation of the human mind and has a fair prospect of existing with increasing activity to the end of time.

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NOISE, n. A stench in the ear. Undomesticated music. The chief product and authenticating sign of civilization.

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IMPALE, v.t. In popular usage, to pierce with any weapon which remains fixed in the wound . . . . properly, to put to death by thrusting an upright sharp stake into the body, the victim being left in a sitting position.

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Uncommon extension of the fear of death.

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CUNNING, n. The faculty that distinguishes a weak animal or person from a strong one. It brings its possessor much mental satisfaction and great material adversity. An Italian proverb says: "The furrier gets the skins of more foxes than asses."

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Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.

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Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

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BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.

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DISOBEDIENCE, n. The silver lining to the cloud of servitude.

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USAGE, n. The First Person of the literary Trinity, the Second and Third being Custom and Conventionality. Imbued with a decent reverence for this Holy Triad an industrious writer may hope to produce books that will live as long as the fashion.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hope Quotes , Fashion Quotes

plagiarism, n. A literary coincidence compounded of a discreditable priority and an honorable subsequence.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Priorities Quotes , Coincidence Quotes

Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Ties Quotes , Debtors Quotes

Human nature is pretty well balanced; for every lacking virtue there is a rough substitute that will serve at a pinch--as cunning is the wisdom of the unwise, and ferocity the courage of the coward.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Coward Quotes , Human Nature Quotes

True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.

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RICH, adj. Holding in trust and subject to an accounting the property of the indolent, the incompetent, the unthrifty, the envious and the luckless.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Trust Quotes , Envy Quotes

MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earth and Canada.

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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.

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A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hands Quotes