Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Fear Quotes, Brain Quotes

Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.

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Glutton- A person who escapes the evils of moderation by committing dyspepsia.

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Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World.

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PERORATION, n. The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.

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Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.

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PROPERTY, n. Any material thing, having no particular value, that may be held by A against the cupidity of B. Whatever gratifies the passion for possession in one and disappoints it in all others. The object of man's brief rapacity and long indifference.

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GNOSTICS, n. A sect of philosophers who tried to engineer a fusion between the early Christians and the Platonists. The former would not go into the caucus and the combination failed, greatly to the chagrin of the fusion managers.

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hybrid, n. A pooled issue.

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LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.

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Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

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YOUTH, n. The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a living Homer.

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A malefactor who atones for making your writing nonsense by permitting the compositor to make it unintelligible.

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The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.

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WEATHER, n. The climate of an hour. A permanent topic of conversation among persons whom it does not interest, but who have inherited the tendency to chatter about it from naked arboreal ancestors whom it keenly concerned. The setting up of official weather bureaus and their maintenance in mendacity prove that even governments are accessible to suasion by the rude forefathers of the jungle.

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Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.

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Immoral" is the judgment of the stalled ox on the gamboling lamb.

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Condole - to show that bereavement is a smaller evil than sympathy.

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PRISON, n. A place of punishments and rewards. The poet assures us that - stone walls do not a prison make.

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RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the affairs of to-day.

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Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.

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