Winston Churchill Quotes, Business Quotes, Humorous Quotes

Everyone is in favor of free speech. Hardly a day passes without its being extolled, but some people's idea of it is that they are free to say what they like, but if anyone else says anything back, that is an outrage.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Business Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

"Oh!" said my aunt, "I was not aware at first to whom I had the pleasure of objecting."

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

It is no harm to be an ass, if one is content to bray and not kick.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Marriage Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A joke is a very serious thing.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

He had never seen a woman doctor before, and his whole conservative soul rose up in revolt at the idea. He could not recall any biblical injunction that the man should remain ever the doctor and the woman the nurse, and yet he felt as if a blasphemy had been committed.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Biblical Quotes

I think you want a little unofficial help. Three undetected murders in one year won't do, Lestrade. But you handled the Molesey Mystery with less than your usual - that's to say, you handled it fairly well.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

I observe the physician with the same diligence as the disease.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : John Donne Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

His neighbor is a tooth-drawer. That bag at his girdle is full of the teeth that he drew at Winchester fair. I warrant that there are more sound ones than sorry, for he is quick at his work and a trifle dim in the eye.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Sorry Quotes , Humorous Quotes

They spell it da Vinci and pronounce it da Vinchy. Foreigners always spell better than they pronounce.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Travel Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Both Miss Lavinia and Miss Clarissa had a superstition, however, that he would have declared his passion, if he had not been cut short in his youth (at about sixty) by over-drinking his constitution, and over-doing an attempt to set it right again by swilling Bath water.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Goresthorpe Grange is a feudal mansion - or so it was termed in the advertisement which originally brought it under my notice. Its right to this adjective had a most remarkable effect upon its price, and the advantages gained may possibly be more sentimental than real. Still, it is soothing to me to know that I have slits in my staircase through which I can discharge arrows; and there is a sense of power in the fact of possessing a complicated apparatus by means of which I am enabled to pour molten lead upon the head of the casual visitor.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Real Quotes , Humorous Quotes

My uncle, Mr. Stephen Maple, had been at the same time the most successful and the least respectable of our family, so that we hardly knew whether to take credit for his wealth or to feel ashamed of his position.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Uncles Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I am engaged in answering that Italian buffoon, Mazotti, whose views upon the larval development of the tropical termites have excited my derision and contempt . . .

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I decided to stop drinking with creeps. I decided to drink only with friends. I've lost 30 pounds.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Drinking Quotes

Because of its vitality, the computing field is always in desperate need of new cliches: Banality soothes our nerves.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Alan Perlis Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Technology Quotes

I sometimes wonder if the manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Alan Coren Quotes , Funny Inspirational Quotes , Humorous Quotes