Winston Churchill Quotes, Humorous Quotes

Don't interrupt me while I'm interrupting.

4 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Even more exasperating than the guy who thinks he knows it all is the one who really does.

5 years ago

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Tags : Al Bernstein Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Knowledge Quotes

Man is but mortal: and there is a point beyond which human courage cannot extend. Mr. Pickwick gazed through his spectacles for an instant on the advancing mass, and then fairly turned his back and-we will not say fled; firstly, because it is an ignoble term, and, secondly, because Mr. Pickwick's figure was by no means adapted for that mode of retreat-he trotted away, at as quick a rate as his legs would convey him;.

4 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

"Next," said Mrs Wilfer with a wave of her gloves, expressive of abdication under protest from the culinary throne, "I would recommend examination of the bacon in the saucepan on the fire, and also of the potatoes by the application of a fork. Preparation of the greens will further become necessary if you persist in this unseemly demeanour."

4 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

"Oh!" said my aunt, "I was not aware at first to whom I had the pleasure of objecting."

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

He had never seen a woman doctor before, and his whole conservative soul rose up in revolt at the idea. He could not recall any biblical injunction that the man should remain ever the doctor and the woman the nurse, and yet he felt as if a blasphemy had been committed.

4 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Biblical Quotes

I am not an economist. I am an honest man!

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Honesty Quotes , Humorous Quotes

One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly.

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Death Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Talkers are no good doers.

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Silence Quotes

I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fitness Quotes , Humorous Quotes

" ... It is not my desire to wound the feelings of any person with whom I am connected in family bonds. I may be a hypocrite," said Mr. Pecksniff, cuttingly, "but I am not a brute."

4 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A politician needs the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. And to have the ability afterwards to explain why it didn't happen.

4 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Everyone is in favor of free speech. Hardly a day passes without its being extolled, but some people's idea of it is that they are free to say what they like, but if anyone else says anything back, that is an outrage.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Business Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes

The less experienced a doctor is, the higher are his notions of professional dignity . . .

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

Humor is also a way of saying something serious.

4 years ago

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it.

4 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There seems to me to be absolutely no limit to the inanity and credulity of the human race. Homo Sapiens! Homo idioticus!

4 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

The sky was of the deepest blue, with a few white, fleecy clouds drifting lazily across it, and the air was filled with the low drone of insects or with a sudden sharper note as bee or bluefly shot past with its quivering, long-drawn hum, like an insect tuning-fork.

4 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes