Adam Carolla Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Basketball Quotes

Millions of guys play millions of basketball games every day of the week at the playground or the YMCA. But LeBron James gets $20 million a year because he can jam on all of those guys. We're always going to want to see LeBron and Kobe go at it.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Basketball Quotes

I don't burn any calories trying to be masculine; I just happen to be from that world.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Trying Quotes , World Quotes

I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Nuts Quotes , Car Quotes

Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all of your readers that it doesn't have to be between Thai and Mexican every night. Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sorry Quotes , Night Quotes

I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Podcasting Quotes , Form Quotes

Honestly, I've always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed - that kind of stuff.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Bed Quotes , Stuff Quotes

It's like the Fouth of July in my underpants.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , July Quotes

There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Christian Quotes , Atheist Quotes

I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they're making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Nice Quotes

That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sports Quotes , Dream Quotes

I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Hurt Quotes , Nice Quotes

I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The very definition of 'beauty' is outside.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Definitions Quotes

If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , People Quotes , Hollywood Quotes

To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can't you do.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Important Quotes , Ability Quotes

Figure out what to do, then take a nap.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sleep Quotes , Names Quotes

The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor, I'm just gonna tell her, "Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they'll have to hire you, they can't really fire you, and you don't have to produce that much. It'll be awesome."

4 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Daughter Quotes , Mother Quotes