Mark Twain Quotes, Pain Quotes, Revenge Quotes

Therein lies the defect of revenge: it's all in the anticipation; the thing itself is a pain, not a pleasure; at least the pain is the biggest end of it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pain Quotes , Revenge Quotes

All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Compassion Quotes

If the man doesn't believe as we do, we say he is a crank, and that settles it. I mean, it does nowadays, because now we can't burn him.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , Believe Quotes

Man - a figment of God's imagination.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Imagination Quotes

It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Religious Quotes

I simply can´t resist a cat, particularly a purring one. They are the cleanest, cunningest, and most intelligent things I know, outside of the girl you love, of course.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Girl Quotes , Cat Quotes

It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mistake Quotes , People Quotes

I've dealt with many crises in my life, but few will ever happen.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Reality Quotes , Crisis Quotes

Constellations have always been troublesome things to name. If you give one of them a fanciful name, it will always refuse to live up to it; it will always persist in not resembling the thing it has been named for.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Names Quotes , Giving Quotes

The unspoken word is capital. We can invest it or we can squander it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Unspoken Words Quotes , Spoken Word Quotes

Never knew before what eternity was made for. It is to give some of us a chance to learn German.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , German Language Quotes , Giving Quotes

It is noble to teach oneself; it is still nobler to teach others.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Teaching Quotes , Noble Quotes

I wasn't worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two million dollars.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Years Quotes

It is hopeless for the occasional visitor to try to keep up with Chicago-she outgrows his prophecies faster than he can make them. She is always a novelty; for she is never the Chicago you saw when you passed through the last time.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Cities Quotes , Trying Quotes

I saw men whom thirty years had changed but slightly; but their wives had grown old. These were good women; it is very wearing to be good.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Years Quotes

Sometimes you gwyne to git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick; but every time you's gwyne to git well agin.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hurt Quotes , Sick Quotes

Suppose . . . burglars had made entry into this . . . [library]. Picture them seated here on this floor, pouring the light of their dark-lanterns over some books they found, and thus absorbing moral truths and getting moral uplift. The whole course of their lives would have been changed. As it was, they kept straight on in their immoral way and were sent to jail. For all I know, they may next be sent to Congress.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Uplifting Quotes

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Atheist Quotes , Prayer Quotes

There is a sumptuous variety about the New England weather... In the spring I have counted one hundred and twenty-six different kinds of weather inside of four and twenty hours.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Spring Quotes , Weather Quotes

To be a patriot, one had to say, and keep on saying, "Our Country, right or wrong," and urge on the little war. Have you not perceived that that phrase is an insult to the nation?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Religious Quotes