Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Life Quotes

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Upset Quotes , Oratory Quotes

There has been only one Christian. They caught and curcified him-early.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Christian Quotes , Religious Quotes

[The Bible is] a mass of fables and traditions, mere mythology.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religion Quotes , Fables Quotes

When a humorist ventures upon the grave concerns of life he must do his job better than another man or he works harm to his cause.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Men Quotes

There ain't nothing more to write about and I'm rotten glad of it, because if I'd know'd what trouble it was to make a book, I wouldn't a tackled it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Writing Quotes

You feel mighty free and easy and comfortable on a raft.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Rafting Quotes , Easy Quotes

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Bullying Quotes

Narrative should flow as flows the brook down through the hills and the leafy woodlands...a brook that never goes straight for a minute, but goes and goes briskly, sometimes ungrammatically, and sometimes fetching a horseshoe of ¾ of a mile around and at the end of the circuit flowing within a yard of the path that it traversed an hour before; but always going and always following at least one law, always loyal to that law, the law of narrative, which has no law. Nothing to do but make the trip; the how of it is not important, so that the trip is made.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes , Important Quotes

Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Education Quotes , Running Quotes

... the English alphabet is pure insanity..., It can hardly spell any word in the language with any degree of certainty.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Insanity Quotes , Degrees Quotes

Your actions speak so much louder than words.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiring Quotes , One Day At A Time Quotes

A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Food Quotes

This editor is a critic. He has pulled out his carving-knife and his tomahawk and is starting after a book which he is going to have for breakfast.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Knives Quotes

Travel is fatal to bigotry.

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The house was as empty as a beer closet in premises where painters have been at work.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Beer Quotes

In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Ideas Quotes

There is not an acre of ground on the globe that is in possession of its rightful owner, or that has not been taken away from owner after owner, cycle afer cycle, by force and bloodshed.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Taken Quotes , Acres Quotes

The problem with education is school.

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The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Life Quotes